Being A Friend

There are no deep insights into Scripture in this post. Just something that I need to get off my chest.

If you are a woman, you more than likely enjoy having friends. In fact, I think it is pretty safe to say that most ordinary women find friendship to be quite necessary, and will suffer if they find themselves lonely and isolated.

Christian women should never find themselves isolated and lonely. If they do, then the church is failing. Christian women should be the most welcoming, friendly, hospitable, outward reaching women in the community. We should be getting together and sharing deep, unusual friendships with each other so often that all of our non-Christian friends are jealous.

Unfortunately, I think the scenario I described above is rare. Perhaps you find yourself surrounded by a wonderful community of Christian sisters. Praise the Lord if that is the case. You may not realize how blessed you are.

I happen to live in a smallish town in the Bible Belt of America. There are literally churches on almost every corner in the town I live in. You would think that a young Christian woman moving here would find no lack of young Christian women eager to reach out and fold her into fellowship with them. But over and over again I hear differently. I hear of women who go to church and nobody asks them what their name is. I hear of women who have lived here for a year, all the while going to church, and have yet to be invited over to share a meal in another church member's home.

Shame on us.

I am forced to imagine that women who have lived in the same town for their entire life, and are surrounded by the friends they grew up with, have no idea what it feels like to need a friend. They have no idea what it means to be new in town and to feel lost and lonely, to go to church hoping to find friendships and companionship and leave every week feeling dejected and rejected. To listen to the women around them in Sunday School talk about parties and dinners together and wonder why nobody thought to include the new girl.

Shame. Shame. Shame.

Christian woman, let me tell you something. You might be the one who needs to extend yourself and reach out to that new face in town. It is going to cost you something. It is going to cost time and effort and emotional energy. You are going to have to risk being rejected. You are going to have to give up time with the people you already know and love, or perhaps put up with having an unfamiliar personality at your next gathering. It is going to cost you. But you MUST be willing to pay the price. It is an affront to the idea of Christian hospitality for you to leave people out and ignore them.

Or, you might be that new person in town who wonders why the Christians around you aren't acting like they ought. You, too, are going to have to reach out. It is almost certainly going to cost you something. You might very well be rejected by women who don't even understand how callous and uncaring they are being. You are going to have to feel your way through unfamiliar group dynamics and go to the effort of getting to know someone new. But you need other Christian women in your life, and the other women might not realize it yet, but they will be enriched by you too.

The town I live in happens to be the home of an Air Force base. And I've had the privilege of meeting and loving several women who are Air Force wives over the years. It is a story that always has a bitter sweet ending. All of them move away eventually and leave me with a little hole in my heart. But I am richer and wiser and fuller for having taken the time to develop friendships with them. And more than once they have expressed to me how glad they are that a 'local' woman was willing to take the risk of loving them. Because all too often, it doesn't happen.

That is a shame and a pity.

I think all of us women are tempted to sit at home and wonder why nobody calls us up and asks us to do something. It is easy to be lonely and feel sorry for yourself and how 'left out' you are. There is an simple solution to that kind of problem. Quit wishing for friends. Instead, be a friend. Be willing to make that phone call and extend the invitation. Be willing to let people into your home and show them that you might not be perfect. Take the chance, risk the rejection, and push the envelope. Be a friend. Because someone out there is feeling just as isolated and lonely as you are.

And that should never happen to a Christian woman.

Locks of Love

I had somewhere between 11 and 15 inches of my hair cut off today. It was 15 inches when I measured it last night, but the actual braid of hair that was cut off was only 11 inches long. I am donating it to an organization called Locks of Love. They provide natural looking, custom fitted wigs for financially disadvantaged children who suffer from long term hair loss.

I don't want you to leave me a comment telling me how great I am for doing this.

Instead, I want to tell you a little bit about why I decided to spend over a year growing my hair out in order to make the donation.

I don't usually mention my children on this blog, but I'm going to make an exception today. Because becoming a mother affected me in ways that are too profound to even express in words. I literally became a different person after the birth of my first child.

I don't have time to give you all of the details of that process. But I want to describe a snapshot moment which birthed an incredible thing that had previously been in short supply in my heart: compassion.

One of my children was born prematurely and suffered some complications for the first six months of life. That child is perfectly healthy today, but for the first few years, we kept a very close eye on whether normal development seemed to be taking place.

There were several episodes that gave us cause to panic. One, in particular, is imprinted in my memory. My child began to make strange, twitching-like head motions. It was odd enough, and recurrent enough, that I couldn't ignore it. I did some online research about strange head twitching, and the most common diagnosis was something called Tourette's syndrome. It causes a person to make strange motions or utter strange words in an uncontrollable way.

I had seen some daytime T.V. shows featuring children with Tourette's. To be cruel and blunt, they seemed strange. One of them yelled out cuss words in the middle of perfectly normal sentences. Another would hit himself on the head out of nowhere. Still another made clucking sounds for no apparent reason.

But suddenly, I was faced with the possibility of being the mother of one of those strange-seeming, different-acting children.

My heart was torn open at the thought of watching my precious child navigate through childhood constantly marked out as the one who was different. The one who had something wrong. The strange one. The one nobody wanted to be friends with. The one that everyone laughed at and made fun of.

I cannot even begin to describe the overwhelming sensation of pain and anguish that those thoughts generated. I could hardly swallow. It became hard to breath. I didn't want to think about it, but I couldn't seem to think about anything else.

In that moment, I would have given anything to take the place of my child, and suffer the ridicule and ostracising of being abnormal. But, of course, it doesn't work that way. Mother's can't take the place of their children.

In my case, my child did not end up having the condition that I so dreaded. My child is normal. But I have never forgotten the horror of those days, when the future seemed so uncertain and ominous.

And I can't forget that there are thousands upon thousands of mothers for whom my passing dread is a daily reality. This world is full of children who are born different. The multitude of possible health complications is mind numbing when you think about it. It is a miracle that even one child is born without health problems.

Growing out my hair in order to give some anonymous little girl somewhere a pretty wig is so minuscule an act that it should hardly register on the radar screen of kindness. I don't feel like I did anything spectacular. But I hope that somewhere, there is a mother whose child doesn't have to feel quite so different.

And in a bigger way, I hope that my own children will grow up feeling the compassion that I seemed to miss out on in my own development. I was not the nicest girl in the world when I was younger. I used people. I discarded friends if they didn't have anything to offer me anymore. A lot of that was plain old immaturity. But still, I think a big part of it was the fact that I lacked compassion for other people, and their pain.

I have no doubt that God intended the trauma of my experience to do exactly what it did. Because compassion is something that I have seen over and over again as I have read through the gospels. There are many references to Jesus feeling compassion for individuals, and even for whole groups of people.

Luke 7:13

"When the Lord saw her, he had compassion on her and said to her, "Do not weep.""

Mark 6:34

"And Jesus, when He came out, saw a great multitude and was moved with compassion for them, because they were like sheep not having a shepherd. So He began to teach them many things."

In Psalm 145, God is described as "gracious and full of compassion." There are plenty of other verses that ascribe compassion as one of the attributes of God.

And in the process of sanctification, God molds us more and more into His own image. For me, the most effective means of sanctification have been hard blows from a painful hammer. But the end result is beautiful. I wouldn't trade the ability to feel compassion for any kind of smooth and worry-free life. I would much rather see the world through lenses that help me to see things just a little bit more like the way God sees them.

And when God sees his children, He is moved with compassion for us. If my child had never suffered temporary complications, I wouldn't be able to understand that at all.

I can't say that I have a heart that is perfectly able to feel true compassion all the time. But I'm a lot better at it than I used to be.

Judge Not Part Two

(For first part of Judge Not, see the post below)

For all of the things that Matthew 7:1, "Judge not, that you be not judged," doesn't mean, there are surely some things that it does mean.

And the context in which it should be understood is stated in the verses immediately following.

Matthew 7:2-3

"For with what judgment you judge, you will be judged; and with the measure you use, it will be measured back to you. And why do you look at the speck in your brother's eye, but do not consider the plank in your own eye?"

So what does that mean anyway? Well, I touched on the meaning of the plank/speck comparison in my last post. And basically, it means that you should only approach others about their sin with a great awareness of, and conviction over, your OWN sin. In other words, there is no room for self-righteous condemnation. We all have sin. We all fall short. And only when you take on the mindset of a "fellow-sinner" do you have the right framework for humbly and gently correcting your brother.

Not only is this likely to be a more effective approach anyway, but there is a strong caution given to us against approaching our brother and his speck in any other manner. Jesus says that we will be judged using the same criteria we use to judge others. In one sense, we are condemning ourselves if we don't use mercy and humility in our dealings with others.

This concept is stated again in Romans 2:1

"Therefore you are inexcusable, O man, whoever you are who judge, for in whatever you judge another you condemn yourself; for you who judge practice the same things."

In other words, use caution when you gear up to judge someone. You are probably guilty of the same thing. And by standing in judgment of another, you are condemning yourself. Because in order to declare him guilty, you have to first knowingly consent to the fact that his actions are a violation of some kind. And like I just said, chances are you have that same sin, in one form or another, lurking about in your own closet. Kind of like, "anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law." You incriminate yourself when you apply the law to others. Because you've just proved that you are aware of the law. And you are therefore without excuse when it comes to your own defense.

But, if you want mercy and compassion applied to you, apply them to those you judge. If you use mercy, you will be given mercy. If you harshly condemn, you will be harshly condemned.

As a side note here, let me add that these cautions are given to each of us as individual brothers and sisters. The church is given very specific instructions for dealing with its members who are in sin. I'm not talking about those things here. I'm only talking about our dealings, as individuals, with individuals.

And lest you think that somehow I am giving the green light to blatant sinners, and a yellow light to righteous standards, think again. Just because we are cautioned about the way we apply judgment does not mean that we are to relax our standards as Christians. Part of the reason that we don't have to judge our neighbor is because God has already done it. God has given us His law. And God's law has already explicitly condemned sin in all of its shapes, forms and fashions. It is not up to us to decide what is a sin and what isn't. The law of God has taken plenty of care of that, thank you very much. You either accept it or you reject it.

Just because some people want to make the law do handstands and backflips in order to justify their fleshly desires, doesn't change the fact that they will stand condemned before the law. Their tricksy reasoning and human wisdom will be meaningless before the Judge of all the universe. He has access to the thoughts of their hearts and minds. We don't. And that is why ultimate judgment can only be left up to Him.

In the meantime, practice mercy and compassion. And mourn over your sin alongside the sins of others. In doing so, you will be equipped to help your brother out when a speck appears in his eye. Otherwise, beware of your measuring stick being turned around and held up against you.

Always Be Prepared

I've been thinking a lot since yesterday. I suppose that the visit I had from the Jehovah's Witnesses may have been as much for my benefit as anything else. I promise I'm not going to let this blog shift its focus onto apologetics. (Apologetics, by the way, is the reasoned arguments that you provide to defend your faith, that is not the formal definition, but I think it works just fine. In other words, it is the reasoning that explains why you believe what you believe.)

But, ladies, I came to realize something yesterday. Far too many of us are woefully ignorant of Scripture. And I feel the need to gently fuss about it.

My misguided visitors were rather surprised when I not only opened the door and spoke to them, but when I also proved to know a thing or two about the Bible. If their reaction is to be trusted, this is a rare occurrence. Shame on us!

I know all the arguments against engaging the Jehovah's Witnesses or the Mormons who come knocking: they have memorized their doctrine and the Bible verses that appear to support them, their logic is intentionally tricky and they might manage to confuse you, you won't change their mind anyway, so why bother.

But I'm afraid there are two bigger reasons we don't open the door. One, we don't really care about the lost souls on our front porch who are earnestly heading straight toward eternal damnation. That is simply terrible! Second, we don't know how to make a reasoned defense of our faith, and so we are afraid to even try. This is just as bad!

In 1 Peter 3:15, we are told, "But sanctify the Lord God in your hearts, and always be ready to give a defense to everyone who asks you a reason for the hope that is in you, with meekness and fear;." (emphasis mine) I know that some people see this verse as encouragement to freely give your personal testimony. But even the Buddhist can give an honest and genuine testimony. That doesn't make his faith true, it just means that he really, sincerely believes it. We, who posses the truth, must be able to provide more than just our personal experience. We must be able to assert the authority of Scripture.

Now, don't think I'm going to fuss at you today without giving you a little help in the right direction. I can't pretend that I've memorized every single section of Scripture that points to, or explicitly claims, or obviously shows, the divinity of Christ. I did read many of them today, but in a pinch, I doubt I would be able to recall them immediately.

But I did see something that I thought I could remember, and you can too. Any one of you who read this blog can remember two numbers: 20:28.

That's right, before I even tell you what the verses are or what book they are in, I want you to make yourself a giant mental sticky note: 20:28. Say it out loud, write it down, or whatever helps you to remember. 20:28.

OK, now, remember this: the last and the first. That's easy isn't it? We are going to find our key verses in the last of the Gospels, which is John, and the first book that comes after them, which is Acts. John and Acts, got it?

Here we go:

John 20:28

"And Thomas answered and said to Him, "My Lord and my God!"

In this verse, Thomas explicitly calls Jesus not only Lord, as he was accustomed to calling him prior to this point, but he also explicitly calls Jesus "God." The Greek word used here for God is "theos." And in your Bible this word is translated with a capital "G" not a small "g." That means God as in the one true God: Jehovah. Now, it is true that elsewhere in the Bible, this exact same word is translated with a little "g." But even if that were the proper translation, it doesn't matter. Because in the very next verse, John 20:29, Jesus commends Thomas for believing that He is God. Jesus cannot possibly be sinless as a man, AND accept worship as God. He must be either God, or a sinner.

You may get some convoluted argument about mistranslations, misunderstandings, etc. But stick to your guns. Either Jesus has just committed a sin by accepting worship as God, or Jesus is sinless AND IS GOD. The text is plain and speaks for itself.

Then we have Acts 20:28:

"Therefore take heed to yourselves and to all the flock, among which the Holy Spirit has made you overseers, to shepherd the church of God which He purchased with His own blood." (emphasis mine)

This one is simple. Here we have it explicitly stated that God purchased the flock (that would be the church) with HIS OWN BLOOD. This must mean that the blood which Jesus shed was the blood of God. Jesus, must therefore, be God.

Let me tell you, I've looked at so many Bible verses today pertaining to the divinity of Christ that my head started to spin at one point. I am realistic enough to realize that not all of you are going to do the same thing. But really, if you can remember these two addresses (verses) you are well on your way to being able to defend the divinity of Christ.

So, please, next time, open your door, too. Don't view the person on the other side as a threat. Allow the Holy Spirit to use you. Show love, be polite, be gentle and respectful. But be prepared to show the truth. Even if it goes badly, and you feel like you botched the whole thing, it is good practice. You can do better next time. More importantly though, it is not up to you to be perfect or to know every detailed argument. The Holy Spirit is the one who works in people's hearts to lift the veil and reveal the truth. It's an amazing privilege to be used by Him in the process. So even if you bumble and stutter and feel ignorant, fear not. If God has a purpose, it will be fulfilled, regardless of your abilities or lack thereof.

And don't forget: 20:28, the last and the first. How hard is that?

P.S. To my regular readers: I am well aware that this post may attract some strange comments. It's OK if that happens. They are welcome to read my post, but I really wrote it for all of you who normally drop by for a visit.

Ishmael

I went to tennis clinic yesterday. I've been playing at playing tennis for almost a year now. I'm not a serious player, or a good one for that matter, by any stretch of the imagination. But I enjoy the exercise and I've met some neat women on the courts.

We did a drill where one player stayed on one side of the court, and hit the ball against two players on the other side. The entire group rotated through the side with two players, while the single player stayed put. So basically, it was one person against everyone else. Don't worry, everyone got to have a turn being the singleton. Including me.

Near the end of my solo performance, I joked, "You can just call me Ishmael today!"

Yeah...nobody else thought it was funny either.

You all know who Ishmael is don't you? He is the son that Abraham had with the handmaiden of his wife, Sarah. God promised to bless Abraham with more descendants than he could count. But Abraham's wife, Sarah, was barren. So when Sarah decided that God was not going to make good on His promise, she took matters into her own hands and offered her handmaiden Hagar to Abraham. It was the custom of the day that any children born from Abraham and Hagar would be considered Sarah's children.


Emotionally, I have always had a hard time with the plight of Hagar. We see glimpses of her personality in scripture that are not very flattering. For instance, when she becomes pregnant, she gets all haughty and despises her mistress, Sarah. Being 21st century Americans, we have a hard time with this whole master-servant relationship. It seems very clear to us that all people should be considered equal; we look down on the idea of servitude. But still, in Hagar and Sarah's time, Hagar was behaving very badly to scorn Sarah and exalt herself over her mistress.


Even taking that, and other, bad behaviors into account, I feel so much pity for Hagar. When I first did an in-depth study that included her story, I was nursing my son, and no doubt had a heightened emotional sensitivity to her situation. One part in particular, still jars my heart.

Genesis 21:14-16

"So Abraham rose early in the morning, and took bread and a skin of water; and putting it on her shoulder, he gave it and the boy to Hagar, and sent her away. Then she departed and wandered in the Wilderness of Beersheba. And the water in the skin was used up, and she placed the boy under one of the shrubs. Then she went and sat down across from him at a distance of about a bowshot; for she said to herself, "Let me not see the death of the boy." So she sat opposite him, and lifted her voice and wept."

It still makes me teary-eyed to read that. Can you imagine wandering around in the desert, abandoned, cast out, despised and rejected, with your helpless child depending on you, and being unable to provide? Its almost more than I can think about. Picturing her putting her son under the shrub, so she won't see him die, but unable to leave him alone, so she just goes a little way off, tears my mother's heart in two.

(Hagar and Ishmael come out OK in the end. God speaks to Hagar, and shows her a well of water. Ishmael goes on to father a mighty nation.)

If you thought that the Old Testament was dusty and yawn-inducing, you should seriously reconsider. It's got more twists, turns and tragedies than Days of our Lives. The people that God chose, and revealed Himself to, were far from perfect. They were deeply flawed, and not only that, but Scripture highlights their weaknesses instead of covering them up. You can look at that as encouragement for you and me, because we are deeply flawed too. But ultimately, what it really does is point to our need for one who is perfect--Jesus. All of the men who came before Jesus had failings, even the mighty ones like Elijah and Moses.

I wonder why nobody laughed at my Ishmael joke. You know...the name Ishmael...it means "Yahweh has been attentive to your humiliation."

Oh, you didn't know that? I thought everybody knew that. Huh. No wonder my joke was such a flop. Almost as bad as my performance at tennis.

Psalm 73

In case you can't tell from my recent posts, I have been reading through the Psalms. Some of them are so relevant and applicable to my life, and to our culture in general, that I am left in awe of how true it is that God's word is living and active. (Hebrews 4:12)

I have literally underlined almost the entire 73rd Psalm in my Bible, with notes like "Wow!" and "our culture to a T" written out in the margin. The Psalm is written by a man who has struggled with how unfair life seems. He sees wicked people prosper, living lives of ease and richness, oppressing those around them, and seeming to get away with all of it.

Here is how he describes these wicked, but prosperous people:

Psalm 73:4-9

"They have no struggles;
their bodies are healthy and strong.
they are free from the burdens common to man;
they are not plagued by human ills.
Therefore pride is their necklace;
they clothe themselves with violence.
From their callous hearts comes iniquity;
the evil conceits of their minds know no limits.
They scoff, and speak with malice;
in their arrogance they threaten oppression.
Their mouths lay claim to heaven,
and their tongues take possession of the earth."

Yikes! These people are: prideful, violent, callous, full of iniquity, evil, conceited, scoffers, speakers of malice, arrogant, oppressive and boastful. And what reward do they receive for living such lives? Pretty ample reward it would seem. They have no problems, they are healthy and strong, free of burdens and human ills. That hardly seems fair does it?

I see people who fit this description almost every day of my life. If not in person, there are plenty of them on TV. Gorgeous, gifted, wealthy, selfish people. People who seem to have everything, and deserve none of it. I, like the Psalmist, used to really get hung up on what seemed to be totally unfair.

Here is how he describes the contrast in verses 12-14

"This is what the wicked are like--
always carefree, they increase in wealth.

Surely in vain have I kept my heart pure;
in vain have I washed my hands in innocence.
All day long I have been plagued;
I have been punished every morning."

There you have it. The wicked seem to get everything, those who are innocent and pure in heart only get a raw deal. The Psalmist didn't like this contrast much either, in fact, he tells us in verse 2 that it almost caused him to slip and lose his foothold. In other words, lose faith in God.

Ahh, but then a change takes place. Our Psalmist does a very wise thing. Instead of relying on his own sense of right and wrong, he seeks to understand the situation from God's point of view. I love the way it is described in verses 16-17:

"When I tried to understand all this,
it was oppressive to me
till I entered the sanctuary of God;
then I understood their final destiny."

He enters the sanctuary of God, and then he understands what the real outcome for the seemingly prosperous wicked will be. He goes on to describe it in verses 18-20, and believe me, it is not a pretty picture. You certainly would not be envious of these people anymore.

So what does this mean for me, and for you? Are we supposed to take some kind of sick pleasure in knowing that wicked people will eventually "get what's coming to them?" Hardly. The idea of anyone perishing should never cause us to gloat. It should cause us to feel exactly the opposite, grieved and stricken at what awaits them. But that can be hard to do if you look at them through the eyes of this world.

Instead, try to see them as they really are. Not rich and healthy and beautiful, but impoverished and barren and doomed to destruction. The sexy blond driving a convertible Mercedes? A wasting corpse. The star athlete with the world as his oyster? A shriveled beggar covered with sores. If you can see them through those eyes, you will not struggle with envy. You will feel exactly what you should feel--great compassion. And hopefully, that compassion will motivate you to reach out, and offer them true prosperity, and true life.

Psalm 73: 23-26

"Yet I am always with you;
You hold me by my right hand.
You guide me with your counsel,
and afterward you will take me into glory.
Whom have I in heaven but you?
And earth has nothing I desire besides you.
My flesh and my heart may fail,
but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever."

Broken In the Pit

Psalm 88:6-9

"You have laid me in the lowest pit,
In darkness, in the depths.
Your wrath lies heavy upon me,
And you have afflicted me with all your waves.
You have put away my acquaintances from me;
You have made me an abomination to them;
I am shut up, and I cannot get out;
My eye wastes away because of affliction."

There is a reason this passage in in the Bible. God knows about brokenness, He understands our despair and disappointment and anger. He knows what it feels like to be betrayed, even by those closest to Him, whom He loved and lived in close fellowship with.

In Isaiah 53, Jesus is described as "A Man of sorrows and acquainted with grief." He is also called "despised and rejected by men." Why does this matter? And why am I writing about it today? Well, I have a friend of a friend who is going through a terrible time. Her entire life is crumbling before her eyes. People and things that she thought she could rely on have failed her, brutally and personally.

If I am not describing you and your situation right now, well, good, but I think all of us can use some reminding about these things from time to time. Whether we realize it or not, we are surrounded by hurting people. We see smiles every day of our lives that conceal pain and rage and despair. We are all so good at putting on a mask of ease and contentment, but the truth is that many of us are right in the kind of pit described in Psalm 88. The lowest pit, a pit of darkness, depths, and affliction.

And there is nothing in all of the world that can help besides God. People will always fail us. Science and technology, and counselors and friends--will all come up short in the end. Because they do not have any real power to comfort, no real power to heal and remake what is broken. They may provide some brief form of relief, but nothing lasting, nothing true. Only God has the power to heal us, to make us a new creation, to satisfy and deliver us from the pit.

I want you to read these scripture verses, and really dwell on them. They provide THE hope and THE cure. Nothing else will do it. Only God.

Isaiah 54:6-7

"For the LORD has called you
Like a woman forsaken and grieved in spirit,
Like a youthful wife when you were refused,"
Says your God.
"For a mere moment I have forsaken you,
But with great mercies I will gather you."

Its hard to imagine a more brutal rejection than the rejection of a husband. Just the thought of it makes me gasp inside with horror. But it happens, it happens all of the time. It has happened to so many women that I know. But even if a husband has rejected you, God can gather you back up again, and only He can do it with great mercies.

Isaiah 55:1-2

"Ho, Everyone who thirst,
Come to the waters;
And you who have no money,
Come, buy and eat.
Yes, come buy wine and milk
Without money and without price.

Why do you spend your money for what is not bread,
And your wages for what does not satisfy?
Listen carefully to me, and eat what is good
And let your soul delight itself in abundance."

These verses are so powerful. Did you see what they say? Stop wasting yourself and your energies on what does not provide life and satisfaction. We are all guilty of this sometimes--we chase after stale crusts of bread and brackish water. And we chase after them with all of our "money" and all of our "wages," everything that we think we have. But why? When God wants to fill us with rich things, good things, wine and milk, and all for free, for nothing.

Listen to how God's children are described:

Psalm 36:8-9

"They are abundantly satisfied with the fullness of Your house,
And You give them drink from the river of your pleasures.
For with you is the fountain of life;
In Your light we see light."

Abundant satisfaction, drink from a river of pleasures, life, light, all of these are in store for those who put their trust in the LORD.

So what does all of this have to do with being broken and in a pit? Well, for many people, the pit is where they first begin to search for God. This has largely been the case in my own life. Until I found myself in desperation, I did not think I really needed God all that much. I had managed to run my own life in a somewhat satisfying manner. But life has a way of turning out differently than we expect, of throwing a shock or a surprise at us that we don't welcome. And it often involves a great deal of personal pain. I don't want to minimize pain, I've had enough of it in this life to understand how powerful and crippling pain (or even the possibility of pain) can be. But in the midst of it, in the very worst of it, God cupped my chin in His magnificent hands and gently wiped every tear away. Not because I deserved it, but because He loved me.

He reminded my heart of the promise in Isaiah 43:

"When you pass through the waters, I will be with you;
And through the rivers, they shall not overflow you.
When you walk through the fire, you shall not be burned,
Nor shall the flame scorch you."

He doesn't promise to make the pain go away. Sometimes He might, but that is not what He promises. Instead He promises to be faithful to us, to never leave us, to never forsake us, to be with us always, to love us unconditionally.

Isaiah 54:10

"For the mountains shall depart
And the hills be removed,
But My kindness shall not depart from you,
Nor shall my covenant of peace be removed,
Says the LORD, who has mercy on you."

Every single thing in this life may fail or disappoint you, even the mountains and the hills are not trustworthy compared to God and His promises. He promises us kindness and peace. Don't miss that last line of the verse: the LORD who has mercy on you. I prefer the NIV translation: the LORD who has compassion for you. Compassion, real compassion, that comes from a man of sorrows, one who is acquainted with grief, one who has felt despised and rejected. That is a Man who can understand, that is a Man you can trust and hold on to.

Don't chase after things that aren't bread. Don't spend your money on things that can't satisfy. Eat what is good-let your soul delight in the richest of fare. Let the LORD gather you up with tender mercies, hold on to Him in the midst of the storm, call out to Him from the bottom of the pit.

I want to show you one more thing, one more passage of scripture, and then I'm going to end this post. I know its a really long one. But I hope it helps someone, someone who needs to hear these things at this exact moment.

If you are the one who is in the pit, the pit that I described at the top of the post, listen to this:

Psalm 40: 1-3

"I waited patiently for the LORD;
And He inclined to me,
And heard my cry.
He also brought me up out of a horrible pit,
Out of the miry clay
And set my feet upon a rock,
And established my steps,
He has put a new song in my mouth--
Praise to our God;
Many will see it and fear,
And will trust in the LORD."

Don't stay in the pit. Cry out to God. He will lift you up and set you on firm ground. In fact, He is the only one who can. What better choice do you have?

Another Divine Appointment

I had a strange morning today. I gave a stranger a ride home. I don't usually pick up people walking on the side of the road. In fact, I am probably more paranoid about picking up strangers than your average person, because my husband and I wasted a lot of time and money trying to help someone that we picked up on the side of the road several years ago. But that is another story.

I had been at a friends house and was leaving her neighborhood. As I pulled up to a Stop sign, waiting to pull onto a busy road, an older-middle-aged woman walked up to my window. She was well dressed, in slacks and a stylish sweater. She had on lipstick and jewelry, I could even smell the perfume she was wearing. She asked if I was heading toward a certain neighborhood. I could see that she had been crying. In fact, she was wiping tears off of her cheeks the whole time I talked to her.

I was not heading in the direction she asked about, in fact I needed to be somewhere in the opposite direction in 25 minutes. Plus, I am not the kind of person who gives rides to strangers.

Here is where the story gets interesting. All of this was happening, literally, right across the street from my church. I could see that there were several cars in the church parking lot, and I knew that our church secretary was there as well. I tried to talk the distressed woman into walking across the street and getting help from someone inside. She didn't want to do that. I asked her if I could call someone, and she only cried more and said "no." I tried to ask her if she was in trouble, or if she needed some help, but she just kept saying that she wanted to go home.

At that point she left the side of my car and started walking back down the road. It was 77 degrees and sunny, and based on the place she had asked me to take her, I knew she had a long way to go in the heat. I thought for a moment, but decided that she was probably a woman who was stranded and in real need of help, and not some scam artist or dangerous person. I mean, she was very well dressed, she was even carrying a nice black leather purse. I think it was the lipstick and nice perfume that made up my mind. It would be like my mother or my mother-in-law being stranded and needing help from a stranger.

I pulled into the parking lot of my church, and walked inside. One of the secretaries was standing right there. I asked her if she could ride with me, and I briefly explained what was going on. She grabbed her purse, hopped in my car, and we drove down the road and picked up the distressed woman.

She was very glad to have a ride. As soon as she got in my car, Debbie, the secretary from church, asked if she could pray for her. So as I started driving, she and Debbie held hands and prayed. Then she told us a little bit about why she was stranded and needed a ride.

She told us that she was married to a very mean and controlling man, who treated her very badly. They had been going to marriage counseling, and she said he just lied about everything. She said she just couldn't take it anymore, and walked out. I assume that meant she had just left the marriage counseling and was trying to walk home when I picked her up.

We let her talk for a while, she was still crying, and giving us some more of the story. I'm not going to give you all the details, that is not what is really important. Debbie asked if she had a church home, and she said no. Then she started crying some more and saying she wouldn't go to church with her husband. Debbie wrote down our pastors name and phone number. We gave it to her and told her that she certainly did not have to come to church, but that she could always call if she needed help, or just a person to talk to.

When we got to her house, I asked her if I could pray with her again, and she let me. I don't really even know what I prayed about. I just wanted her to know that I cared, and more importantly, that God cared. I helped her out of the back seat of my car. She cried some more, thanked me and gave me a hug. I can still smell her perfume on my shirt.

I have no idea if she will ever call our pastor, or go to any church. But I have been praying for her all day. I sincerely believe that I was supposed to give her that ride today. I mean, what are the chances that all of that happened randomly? Right across the street from my church? That Debbie would be standing right there when I walked in, and would be able to ride with me so I wouldn't be nervous about giving a stranger a ride?

I wonder if I am supposed to be learning something from this. This is the second older woman in distress that I have encountered recently. Maybe God just wants me to remember that underneath the nice, socially acceptable facade that people present, there are real hurts and needs. Believe me, I spend a lot of time around people who seem perfect. People who seem to have it all. Women with nice black leather purses, stylish sweaters and lipstick perfectly applied. But every once in a while, people will let you see behind it all. Maybe I'm just supposed to remember to keep looking.

Heart of Stone

I have been so anxious to get to my computer all day and get this post up. But it has been one thing after another all morning. So here I am, taking a deep breath, and here we go...

Ezekiel 36:26-27

"I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit within you; I will take the heart of stone out of your flesh and give you a heart of flesh. I will put My Spirit within you and cause you to walk in My statutes, and you will keep My judgments and do them."

Jeremiah 24:7

"Then I will give them a heart to know Me, that I am the LORD, and they shall be my people and I will be their God, for they shall return to me with their whole heart."

If you have been reading this blog, you may have perceived that I can be pretty emotional. Well, that has not always been the case. I feel like I really did have a heart of stone for most of my life. It has only been in the past 4 years that I have learned how to really feel things deeply. I like to say that God has been working on giving me a heart of compassion. But really, compassion is just a part of the whole spectrum of emotions God has placed into my heart.

The process of removing my stone heart and replacing it with one of flesh has been pretty painful for me. But I can see very clearly that if I had not been made to go through some painful experiences I would not have accepted the heart that God had in store for me.

My heart of stone was bound up in such a way that I felt very little emotion at all. That was a very safe way to live my life. I didn't let myself get hurt by very much, and I certainly did not plug into the pain of those around me. But because God loved me enough to pour his grace and overwhelming love into my heart, I am a changed person. I feel thing very deeply. In fact, I like to joke that maybe God has given me a little too much compassion. I find tears welling up in my eyes amazingly often when I am having conversations with other women. Sometimes it really hurts to feel so strongly. I suffer when those I love suffer. I even suffer when I hear about people I barely know suffering.

BUT, the most awesome side effect of all this emotion is the way that scripture has become ALIVE when I read it. I no longer can read the account of Hagar and Ishmael without weeping. Abraham's emotional turmoil as he is preparing to sacrifice Isaac is almost more than I can bear. And today, when I read the account in Matthew about Jesus being betrayed by Judas and then being abandoned by his disciples, I could barely see through my tears to read the words on the page. Jesus loves me that much! And I accuse God of not caring! Woe to my foolish human nature. How I wish I could see things as God does.

And then, I will read something in Psalms, and I will want to explode with joy. The love that I now understand makes me want to jump up and touch the clouds above! Sometimes I'm pretty sure that I could reach them, too! That is how real my joy is.

I was thinking about a hymn that I love last night on the way home from the evening Bible study.

"O for a thousand tongues to sing my great Redeemer's praise!
The glories of my God and King, the triumphs of His grace."

That caught my sentiment exactly. My one little tongue is inadequate to sing the praises of God that flow through my heart. I would need at least a thousand of them to do it justice.

Back to the suffering for a moment. Even that drives me to God for relief. When I see or experience suffering it makes me long for eternity. I know I have expressed that in several posts. I don't know how else to deal with the horrible circumstances that I hear about sometimes. The truth is that man is not created to handle such pain. We were created to glorify God and enjoy eternal fellowship with Him. And because this world is under the curse of sin, it won't happen to us in this earthly existence. But thank the LORD that He loved us enough to create another way to it.

Aside from the personal nature of my new heart, I think that I have begun to see more of what God's heart for us must be like. He looks on our suffering with compassion. He loves us with love so strong that He died on the cross for us. A cold, stony heart cannot begin to comprehend those powerful emotions. But a new heart, one made of flesh, can begin to.

Compassion

Like all of you, I hear about people who are going through really terrible things in their life. Sometimes it is really hard to think about those situations, they seem too terrible to even think about, much less live through. But of course, God's word is full of comfort (and hope) that applies to everything we struggle with here on earth, even the really really awful and terrible things. But even more than that, God tells us that he has a heart of compassion for our struggles.

Hebrews 4:15 "For we do not have a high priest who cannot sympathize with out weaknesses, but was in all points tempted as we are, yet without sin."

I have always seen that verse from the perspective that Jesus was tempted but He never sinned. Well that is true, but I think that misses something that is even greater about this verse. Notice that Jesus can "sympathize with our weaknesses." That means that He has compassion on us. Not anger, or coldness toward our weaknesses, but real compassion. He doesn't have an attitude of condemnation, He is not out to "get us" for our sins. But in His great love He has compassion for whatever we are going through. Even the really awful, terribly terrible things. Even the weakness that we have struggled with for what seems like forever. Even the one we don't want to talk about. And yes, even the one that everyone knows about and is talking about (maybe behind our back, but hopefully not!)

One thing that God has been working on in my life is a heart of compassion, so lately I am predisposed to see God's compassion for us all over the place. But I think it is because it is really there. So, whether you need compassion in the form of comfort and mercy, or you need compassion because you are struggling with sin, remember that God has it for you. More than you could imagine, and plenty enough to cover your need for it.

And to close, here is one of my favorite verses of all time:

Romans 8:28 "And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His pupose."