Merry Christmas

Sorry this post is getting up so late. I hope that all of you have had a wonderful Christmas. I have been very busy going to parties, school programs, family gatherings and the like for the past few weeks, so my posts have been kinda sparse. That probably won't change until the new year.

But I want all of you faithful readers to know that I have had a wonderful Christmas. It's been a low-key, fun kind of year. I didn't expect any great presents, and I didn't get anything that was amazing, but it didn't even matter. I just enjoyed the holiday, because I kept thinking about that tiny baby born in Bethlehem over two thousand years ago. And that, dear reader is the most amazing present I could ever comprehend.

Good tidings of great joy. Indeed. Indeed.

My Precious

All of you Lord of the Ring fans out there will appreciate this. The trilogy of movies was on television over the weekend here. Against my better judgment, I stayed up late three nights in a row to watch them, even though I own the DVDs of all three and could have watched them without all of the annoying commercial breaks. And gotten to bed at a decent hour.

At the end of The Return of the King, we see Frodo standing above the molten lava flowing in Mount Doom, poised to accomplish the destruction of the ring he has borne through great trial and sacrifice. But as you know, when the moment comes to separate himself from the thing that has brought him so much misery, he cannot bear to let it go. He loves and desires it more than he hates it or wishes it to be destroyed.

How like our sin. We love our sins so much more than we care to admit. We feel justified in committing them. We tell ourselves that they are harmless. We pet and feed and nourish them. Sometimes, even when the moment comes to cast them away and be forgiven of them, we cling to them, cradling them to our breast, refusing to be parted from them.

This would result in great tragedy for us if we were left to our own devices to deal with sin. Fortunately, we are not. For those who belong to Him, God provides sanctification.

Allow me to stretch the illustration of Frodo and the ring a bit more. When it becomes clear that Frodo does not have the will to part himself from the ring, a "terrible" thing happens to him. He is viciously attacked by Gollum, who was once the ring bearer himself. A mighty struggle ensues. In the end, Gollum seems to prevail, by literally biting the finger off of Frodo's hand, and with it, the ring. Gollum's victory is short lived, as he tumbles to his destruction, down into the lake of fire, all the while clutching the ring to himself in ecstasy.

Frodo is left with a permanently maimed hand. But, despite his resistance to the point of violent struggle, he has been freed from the terrible power the ring held over him.

I see a great parallel to sanctification in that struggle. Sometimes God uses "terrible" things to free us and give us life. Surely you know of someone this has happened to? To a small degree, that has been my own experience with sanctification. I resisted it. It hurt and was unpleasant to go through. But in the end, I found myself free. Usually I wasn't even aware of the destruction I was binding myself to until I was free of it. And then, oh, I could fall on my face in thankfulness for the mercy of sanctification.

It would have been so much easier to be obedient to God from the start. To look at my sin and cast it into the fire and be free of it. But I just couldn't. Not in my own power. Mercy was required. Mercy that certainly didn't feel anything like mercy when it happened.

1 Thess 5:23

"Now may the God of peace himself sanctify you completely, and may your whole spirit and body be kept blameless at the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ."

One more thing here. In my own life, the mercy of sanctification has accomplished something I never imagined I would have. A real hunger and thirst for righteousness. I can honestly say that I have it for the first time in my life. I can also say that I have no doubt that I did nothing to get myself to this point. It was all God. It was all mercy.

Boy, Have I Been There!

Deuteronomy 29:19

"and so it may not happen, when he hears the words of this curse, that he blesses himself in his heart, saying, "I shall have peace, even though I follow the dictates of my heart"--as though the drunkard could be included with the sober."

The last part of that verse is translated several different ways, depending on which translation you have, but it is the first part of that verse that strikes home with me.

This verses catches perfectly the way I lived most of my youth and young adult life. Hiding inside the community of God's covenant people, but saying in my heart, I shall have peace, even though I follow the dictates of my heart.

How arrogant and foolish!

Don't miss that this foolish person blesses himself. I can relate! I blessed myself every day of my life, with every thought, every action, every motivation, and every outward obedience. It was all about me blessing myself in my own heart. I think that is a great description of a Pharisee. A person who blesses himself in his heart, all the while following the dictates of his own heart, not the commands of the LORD.

And lest we forget, Jeremiah 17:9 reminds us of what we need to know about our own hearts, apart from the imputed righteousness of Christ.

"The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked; who can know it?"

If you go and read the Deuteronomy verse in it's context, it becomes even more powerful. Moses has just finished recounting to the Israelites the blessings of obedience, and the curses of disobedience. The section that covers the curses of disobedience is not for the fainthearted. It's pretty hard core stuff. (Maybe if you have never read if for yourself, this will sufficiently peak your curiosity enough to send you to your Bible! I highly recommend it!)

I keep trying to do a quick reading of the Old Testament, because I have never read through the whole thing before. My problem is that I keep finding things that are so interesting, I have to stop and think and look up all the cross references. At this rate it is going to take me years to get through the Bible cover to cover! Oh well, at least it will be time and effort well spent. I can't begin to tell you all of the amazing things I have discovered for myself. Only a fraction of it ends up on this blog. I'm only sorry that I didn't start this process sooner!

Another Divine Appointment

I had a strange morning today. I gave a stranger a ride home. I don't usually pick up people walking on the side of the road. In fact, I am probably more paranoid about picking up strangers than your average person, because my husband and I wasted a lot of time and money trying to help someone that we picked up on the side of the road several years ago. But that is another story.

I had been at a friends house and was leaving her neighborhood. As I pulled up to a Stop sign, waiting to pull onto a busy road, an older-middle-aged woman walked up to my window. She was well dressed, in slacks and a stylish sweater. She had on lipstick and jewelry, I could even smell the perfume she was wearing. She asked if I was heading toward a certain neighborhood. I could see that she had been crying. In fact, she was wiping tears off of her cheeks the whole time I talked to her.

I was not heading in the direction she asked about, in fact I needed to be somewhere in the opposite direction in 25 minutes. Plus, I am not the kind of person who gives rides to strangers.

Here is where the story gets interesting. All of this was happening, literally, right across the street from my church. I could see that there were several cars in the church parking lot, and I knew that our church secretary was there as well. I tried to talk the distressed woman into walking across the street and getting help from someone inside. She didn't want to do that. I asked her if I could call someone, and she only cried more and said "no." I tried to ask her if she was in trouble, or if she needed some help, but she just kept saying that she wanted to go home.

At that point she left the side of my car and started walking back down the road. It was 77 degrees and sunny, and based on the place she had asked me to take her, I knew she had a long way to go in the heat. I thought for a moment, but decided that she was probably a woman who was stranded and in real need of help, and not some scam artist or dangerous person. I mean, she was very well dressed, she was even carrying a nice black leather purse. I think it was the lipstick and nice perfume that made up my mind. It would be like my mother or my mother-in-law being stranded and needing help from a stranger.

I pulled into the parking lot of my church, and walked inside. One of the secretaries was standing right there. I asked her if she could ride with me, and I briefly explained what was going on. She grabbed her purse, hopped in my car, and we drove down the road and picked up the distressed woman.

She was very glad to have a ride. As soon as she got in my car, Debbie, the secretary from church, asked if she could pray for her. So as I started driving, she and Debbie held hands and prayed. Then she told us a little bit about why she was stranded and needed a ride.

She told us that she was married to a very mean and controlling man, who treated her very badly. They had been going to marriage counseling, and she said he just lied about everything. She said she just couldn't take it anymore, and walked out. I assume that meant she had just left the marriage counseling and was trying to walk home when I picked her up.

We let her talk for a while, she was still crying, and giving us some more of the story. I'm not going to give you all the details, that is not what is really important. Debbie asked if she had a church home, and she said no. Then she started crying some more and saying she wouldn't go to church with her husband. Debbie wrote down our pastors name and phone number. We gave it to her and told her that she certainly did not have to come to church, but that she could always call if she needed help, or just a person to talk to.

When we got to her house, I asked her if I could pray with her again, and she let me. I don't really even know what I prayed about. I just wanted her to know that I cared, and more importantly, that God cared. I helped her out of the back seat of my car. She cried some more, thanked me and gave me a hug. I can still smell her perfume on my shirt.

I have no idea if she will ever call our pastor, or go to any church. But I have been praying for her all day. I sincerely believe that I was supposed to give her that ride today. I mean, what are the chances that all of that happened randomly? Right across the street from my church? That Debbie would be standing right there when I walked in, and would be able to ride with me so I wouldn't be nervous about giving a stranger a ride?

I wonder if I am supposed to be learning something from this. This is the second older woman in distress that I have encountered recently. Maybe God just wants me to remember that underneath the nice, socially acceptable facade that people present, there are real hurts and needs. Believe me, I spend a lot of time around people who seem perfect. People who seem to have it all. Women with nice black leather purses, stylish sweaters and lipstick perfectly applied. But every once in a while, people will let you see behind it all. Maybe I'm just supposed to remember to keep looking.

Again and Again

I felt it again this morning in church. That indescribable awareness of God's holiness versus my innate sinfulness. It's such a paradox. You would think that this awareness would be a terrible thing, but unfailingly, it is the purest joy I have ever known.

It's about grace. The real cost of it. Grace is cheap and worthless if we think we deserve it somehow. But when we understand the real cost of it, the fact that we could never do anything to even begin to earn it, then, and only then, do we have any understanding of how amazing grace is.

I'm not kidding when I say that I am sitting here and I can't even think of words to describe the infinite, incomprehensible, magnitude of grace.

But God gives it to us. And He doesn't just give us enough to get by, He lavishes it on us. He slathers thick, dense layers of grace all over our wounds and scars. He picks us up from our heap and sends us soaring into the stars. He gives us a garment of praise instead of a spirit of despair.

And to add to what is already almost more than we can understand, He declares that He loves us. He calls us treasure and jewel, pearl and joy. Consider the unlikeliness of it. The mystery, the paradox... Oh, but relish it, delight in it, sing for joy and celebrate it.

Oh come all ye faithful, joyful and triumphant
Oh come ye, oh come ye, to Bethlehem.
Come and behold Him, born the king of angels
Oh come let us adore Him
Oh come let us adore Him
Oh come let us adore Him
Christ the Lord.

May we all adore him.

Romans 11:33

"O the depth of the riches and of the wisdom and the knowledge of God! How unsearchable are His judgments and His ways past finding out!"

I'm Chillin'

Yes, that is a corny title. Forgive me, I couldn't resist. I just want all of you to know that my refrigerator has been repaired.

I had a really interesting conversation with the repair man. I feel pretty sure that he is not a Christian, because I talked about God and the Bible several times and he never responded like you would think a fellow believer would. But he seemed interested in what we talked about. You just never know what a little seed might turn into.

Hills and Valleys

Deuteronomy 11:11-12

"but the land which you cross over to possess is a land of hills and valleys, which drink water from the rain of heaven, a land for which the LORD your God cares; the eyes of the LORD your God are always on it, from the beginning of the year to the very end of the year."

These verses struck me this morning. They are so beautiful. I stopped reading and spent some time just thinking about them, and how they can apply to my own walk with God.

Life in general, but especially the Christian life, can easily be characterized by hills and valleys. Some times we are sitting on top of the world, sailing smoothly through life. Things are happening nicely, and easily. And then suddenly, we may find ourselves in a valley.

But the rain of heaven falls in both the hills and the valleys. Hebrews 13:5 tells us that God will never leave us or forsake us. His "rain" will water us in the highs and the lows. If you think about it, the valley is where you will find pools of water, not up in the hilltops. Have you had an experience like that? You found yourself going through something really difficult, but God provided pools of water for you in the midst of your valley? I have. But, I'll be honest, and admit that I often didn't see the pools of water until I had passed all the way through the valley, climbed up onto the hilltop again, and then turned to gaze back down. And then, I was amazed at all the "water" down there!

Even more wonderful is the idea that our land (our walk with God), is a land for which the LORD our God cares, that His eyes are always on it, from the beginning of the year to the very end of the year. Personally, I love the idea that God's eyes are always on me. As a very immature Christian, this idea was pretty scary. I viewed it as, "God is watching all the really bad things I am doing, and He is going to condemn me for it."

I have done some pretty bad things. But I know that I have been washed as white as snow by the redeeming blood of Christ (Isaiah 1:18.) Now, the idea of God always watching me makes me feel really safe, and taken care of. I know that no matter what happens to me, God is watching, He knows, He gets it, He cares.

Don't miss that God's eyes are watching from the beginning of the year to the very end of the year. I looked up the Hebrew for "year." It does mean, quite literally, year. But it also means a year as a revolution of time. I take that to mean, from the beginning of the event to the end of the event. That event can be lots of different things. As in, from the beginning of my loss, until I recovered from that loss. Or, from the beginning of my struggle with that sin, until I was able to repent and accept forgiveness for that sin. And even, from the beginning of that ministry to the time I saw the first fruit from that ministry.

Another thing that the original Hebrew uncovers is that the word "end," as in "from the beginning of the year to the very end of the year" has as one of its alternate translations the word reward. Read it this way: from the beginning of the year to the very reward of the year. I can think of a few examples of this from my own life. Sometimes I struggle with unbelief. But every single time, when I have wrestled through the issue with God, I am rewarded with increased faith. That increased faith would be the reward (end) of that struggle (year.)

Whew, I hope you got all that! It makes perfect sense to me, but I'm not completely sure that any of the rest of you are going to get it. If you don't, that is OK, because I think I took enough out of those two little verses for the both of us. (And then some!)

A little sin...

Job 37:10

"By the breath of God ice is given, and the broad waters are frozen fast."

About four days ago, as I was sitting in my kitchen, quietly reading my Bible, before the whole house was awake, I noticed that my refrigerator was making a strange, tinny sounding noise. "Strange noise," I thought. Then I ignored it. This went on for about 3 days.

Then Friday, I took what should have been a frozen waffle out of the freezer. Problem was, the waffle was not frozen. It was kind of soft. "Hmm, maybe this is related to that strange noise I have been hearing." I decided to call in an appliance repairman immediately. He showed up at about 4:15 p.m. This is on Friday, remember.

He walked straight into my kitchen, pulled my fridge away from the wall, tinkered around for a pair of minutes (as Beth Moore would say), and pronounced that my compressor was broken and my refrigerator and freezer were worthless, and in fact had not been working properly since the first time I heard that strange noise. This was not a good moment for me.

There was, however, some good news. My fridge was still under warranty (being only 3 years old). The parts and labor would be completely covered under the standard warranty. Bad news? Oh yes. The broken part would need to be ordered, and would take 3-4 days to arrive, and they couldn't order it until Monday. It took me a while to realize what that would mean.

"Oh, that means I have no refrigerator or freezer all weekend? And probably until Thursday of next week? Umm, what am I supposed to do?"

This was apparently not the problem of the appliance guy. He was ready to go and enjoy the weekend.

At first, I thought things would be relatively fine. We have a mini-fridge in our wet bar. I emptied all of the bottles (I'll let you guess what those contained!) out of the mini-fridge and managed to salvage the milk, eggs, butter, lunch meat, cheese, juice, mayo, and cream (gotta have that for coffee). That was all that would fit. My husband brought home some bags of ice, and we stuffed them in the fridge and freezer and hoped that would keep things cool enough. I did do one smart thing, and took all of my chicken and put it in my deep freezer outside.


This morning I realized that the ice-stuffing had been pointless. There was a puddle of water in front of the fridge and condensation all over all of the things left in the fridge. So, facing reality, I got out the garbage bags, and to make a story that is already too long just a little bit shorter, I cleaned that baby out. Four trash bags worth.

Then, I took a good look at what the inside of my refrigerator and freezer looked like when emptied. It was horrible. I will spare you the details. Suffice it to say that I spent a majority of what was a beautiful day, up to my elbows in a sink full of bleach. I never realized how many parts could be taken out of a fridge to be cleaned. All of you women who do this on a regular basis, well, good for you. I don't.

As I was scrubbing mystery goo off the bottom of the freezer, I started thinking that I was going to find a way to turn this into a good spiritual illustration. I may have to stretch to make it work, but I was going to turn this into a good blog post. So, here is my best attempt....

Galatians 5:9

"A little leaven leavens the whole lump."

You know, if I had paid attention to that first tinny sound the fridge was making, I could have spared myself a whole heap of trouble. Chances are, the part would have arrived on Friday, and I would now be enjoying properly cooled food items. Sin is like that, too. We always get a warning sign when there is a problem. Even if it is just a little prick of the conscience. Sometimes it is much more than a little prick, it is more like alarm bells and red flags competing for attention.

At the point of first being aware of the sin, the smart thing to do is take care of the problem immediately. Before it "leavens the lump" and starts causing all kinds of scary things. Just take your pick of sins: romantic thoughts about that guy you dated before you got married, hateful feelings towards that neighbor who lets her dog bark at all hours, gossiping about that woman in church whose children are always out of control, not paying for your Bible Study book because it's done on an honor system, I could go on, but I hope you get the idea. They all start small, but left unchecked and unresolved, could lead you straight into disaster. And you should have at least a prick of conscience if you are doing any them.

But, say you see the problem and choose to ignore it. This is a bad idea. That strange noise my fridge was making should have been enough to make me call the appliance guy. But I chose to ignore it. Really, I did. It was a conscious choice. And by choosing to look the other way and let the noise go on, I ended up with stinky shrimp and slimy goo. The same thing can happen to our hearts and minds. Even our actions. And instead of handling a relatively small sin, with few, if any, consequences, we could be left having to break out the bleach bucket and do some serious work. I would rather deal with small problems, wouldn't you?

1 John 1:9

"If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness."

Acts 3:19-20

"Repent, therefore, and turn again,that your sins may be blotted out, that times of refreshing may come from the presence of the Lord,"


(Now, go back and read the verse at the top of this post. And smile with me!)

One of my friends who read this post told me that she was a little unclear as to why I had to bleach my entire refrigerator. So, in case any of the rest of you have the same question, I thought I would elaborate. There are two reasons I had to bleach everything. First, my refrigerator had not been cooling, AT ALL, for the entire three days that it was making the noise. I guess there was enough cool air, and ambient chill to keep things from being obviously not refrigerated, but by the time I noticed the problem, defrosting, dripping and oozing had already been happening. Second, and probably more importantly, I had not given my fridge a thorough scrubbing in the entire three years I owned it. Now, you know all my dirty little secrets. I don't clean my fridge on a regular basis!

A Tight Rope

The Christian life calls for such a tightrope walk sometimes. Where exactly is the line between works and grace? Or, how do we strive toward heaven, without disregarding the here and now? Where are we supposed to draw the line between enjoying the blessings God has given us, and indulging in excessive luxury? Is it OK to spend time playing tennis, when I could be using that time to disciple a young believer? All of it calls for balance, right? Well, I think there are some things that leave no room for balance, but rather, are clearly meant to be all consuming.

I read these verses the other night.

Deuteronomy 6:4-9

"Hear, O Israel: The LORD our God, the LORD is one! You shall love the LORD your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your strength.

And these words which I command you today shall be in your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, when you walk by the way, when you lie down, and when you rise up. You shall bind them as a sign on your hand, and they shall be as frontlets between your eyes. You shall write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates."


I don't think that leaves much wiggle room. I don't see any indication that we are supposed to take a balanced approach to "these words." This section of scripture is found just after Moses has been recounting to the Israelites the commandments, statutes, and judgments of the LORD. I think it is safe to say that our modern equivalent of those things is the Bible.

Here is how I would break down these verses.

*Love the LORD your God emotionally, practically, actively, with all that you are, and with all of your mind, perspective, and thought life.

*Make these words a part of your heart, as in, part of your emotional understanding, part of what is inside you that drives and motivates you.

*Teach the scripture to your children!!!!

*Talk about the scripture in your home, with those closest to you, with those you love, as part of your everyday life. To me this means regularly, all the time, as a matter of habit. (when you sit in your house)

*Talk about and live according to scripture as you go about your daily business, your routines, your errands, your job! (when you walk by the way)

*Even in your recreation, and times of rest, seek after and love God! (this would be my take on "when you lie down")

*Make it part of the action of your hands: all your works, your accomplishments, your dealings, for me this would include housework, changing diapers, taking care of home and family.

*"frontlets between your eyes"-This one is convicting. Think about what you spend your time looking at, watching, absorbing. TV? Not much of it would be acceptable if we truly looked at it through a veil of scripture, would it? Another way of looking at this-do your frame your opinions (view things) based on what God says, or on what man says?

*God's word should be what we build our homes and home life upon. Our family life should revolve around it. We should be a home and family that proclaims the truth of God's Word in our daily living, our private family time, and our "gates"-the things the world sees when they observe us.

Listen, I am not perfect at this. But, I get the fact that my relationship to God is not subject to being balanced with other things in my life. It is not part of my life, it is my life. It is not part of what I believe, it is the basis of everything I believe. It is not a thing that I participate in, it drives and directs everything else that I do, every part of my life.

That makes me strange in today's culture. Even among many other Christians. The idol of a balanced life has unfortunately crept into our idea of religion.

God does not want us to be balanced. Not when it comes to Him: all your heart, soul, strength. Doesn't leave much else...

Rain, Rain

Psalm 147:7-8

"Sing to the LORD with thanksgiving;
Sing praises on the harp to our God,
Who covers the heavens with clouds,
Who prepares rain for the earth,
Who makes grass to grow on the mountains."

It is pouring here right now. I don't live near Atlanta, but I am in Georgia, and the whole state has been pretty dry. I just checked weather.com, and although it doesn't look like Atlanta is getting any rain, I am thankful for what we are getting in South Georgia.

When I heard the rain start pounding on the roof, I stopped what I was doing and said a prayer of gratitude. I heard a sermon about prayer once that reminded us to pray and thank God when He answers our prayers. For instance, how many times have you prayed and asked God for a safe road trip? When you got to your destination, did you say another prayer of thanks? I've been trying to put that into practice ever since.

Just like living through a literal drought makes me thankful for rain, it is often when I have experienced a spiritual drought that I newly appreciate the manifold blessing given to me by God. I am taken to a place where I must realize all over again, how deep and wide and amazing God's grace is. When I see myself as I am, and when I see God as He is, I am astounded. That He not only accepts me, but loves me and calls me His treasure is beyond my ability to understand.

That is why God's gift of faith is required for us to understand. Because, really, it makes no sense at all from our perspective.

The First Commandment

Matthew 22:36-40

"One of them, an expert in the law, tested him with this question:

"Teacher, which is the greatest commandment in the Law?"

Jesus replied, "Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind." This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: "Love your neighbor as yourself." All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments."

I have been thinking about this verse since last night. I've been be-bopping around a lot of blogs lately, and let me tell you, there are some strange ideas about God and Christianity out there. This post is inspired by a comment I read on another blog. I'll just leave it at that.

Here's the thing: Jesus identified loving God as the FIRST and GREATEST commandment. That is God Himself pinpointing for us what our life ambition should be. It is the center that all the spokes in our lives should revolve around. Until you get this commandment, all the rest is irrelevant.

You can give away everything you own, you can give all your spare time in back breaking service to others, you can preach and study until you are mentally and physically exhausted, you can advocate social change and sign petitions, you can forward "Christian" emails, you can write letters to congressmen, you can drive a hybrid car, or better yet ride a bicycle, you can even praise and worship in church, but until you love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul and all your mind, you are accomplishing nothing.

Here is why. Only when your actions are a reflection of God's glory are they pleasing to God. Until then, you are acting out of self-righteousness and pride. That is blunt, but true. It may not look like self-righteousness and pride, but make no mistake, that is exactly what it is.

Notice that Jesus said to love God first, and then to love your neighbor second. We are incapable of loving our neighbor in any real way unless our love is a reflection of God's love. Until it comes from the overflow of loving God fully, there is an awful lot of YOU involved in your motives and actions. Not only that, but you will wear out and give up if you are trying to love your neighbor in your own power.

Most people are not all that lovable when you get down to the nitty gritty. I am including myself in that statement. We all have fallen short of the glory of God, we all disappoint each other, we all fail and make mistakes. None of us is perfect.

And if you make the mistake of thinking that you can learn to love God by serving your neighbor, you have it all backward. You must serve your neighbor, not in order to love God, but BECAUSE you love God. It's a big difference. One is self-motivated, the other is an outpouring of God's grace in a practical way.

And if you take away God's grace, you take away all the good news.

Forgive Us Our Trespasses

Matthew 6:14

"For if you forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses."

Mark 11:25

"And whenever you stand praying, if you have anything against anyone, forgive him, that your Father in heaven may also forgive you your trespasses. But if you do not forgive, neither will your Father in heaven forgive your trespasses."


Both of those verses appear in red ink in my Bible. That means that Jesus said them Himself. And if Jesus said them, then they are words straight from the mouth of God.

I don't know about you, but meditating on these two verses is startling to me. I think we sometimes soft pedal the idea of forgiving people. But clearly God is extremely serious about His command that we forgive.

Now when I say that we soft pedal the idea of forgiving people, I don't mean that we don't take the issue of forgiveness seriously. Because I think that most Christians really do try to forgive, and they don't want to hold on to anger, bitterness and resentment. But the reality is that many people are harboring anger and bitterness and resentment. And they have been unable to figure out how to really truly forgive a person who has seriously sinned against them.

I see this all the time in the lives of people that I know. People that I am close to and love deeply. I mean no disrespect to my recently deceased grandmother, but unforgiveness and pride were huge strongholds in her life. To the extent that I literally met a relative I have never laid eyes on before at Nanny's funeral. I don't even know the story of what caused the family rift that alienated my grandmother from a whole branch of her family. Neither does my father. But whatever it was, it was powerful, and she was never willing to forgive.

I can't even tell you how sad that makes me. Nanny was a really neat, strong, dynamic, talented, creative, beautiful woman. But she had anger and bitterness in her heart that had a direct effect on her children, and on me too. I know that she is now glorified and in perfect relationship with God. But her children and grandchildren are here in this life reaping the fruit of her actions. O that God would give me grace to avoid doing the same thing to my children!

I think forgiveness could take up a month of posts, but for today this is what I want to spend some time thinking about: I have only been able to understand forgiveness since I have understood the magnitude of forgiveness that I have received from God. When I consider God's holiness, versus my natural sinfulness, I am almost undone. The idea that He would condescend to love me and forgive me is almost too incredible to believe. I don't see how people can understand this concept and treat it lightly.

When I managed to push aside my natural pride long enough to listen to what God said I really was without His grace being applied to me, I understood forgiveness. How can I hold an account of wrongs done to me when God has wiped my sins against Him completely away?

After all, every sin will be dealt with one of two ways. Either it is a sin that Christ paid for on the cross, or the sin will be paid for by eternal separation from God.

I don't mean to tell any of you that it is easy to forgive another person. I know it isn't easy. I have been there. And struggling with the hurt that people caused me and then stuffing it away and trying to pretend it didn't exist got me nowhere.

I have only ever been able to forgive by meditating on the amazing forgiveness God extended to me. I certainly didn't deserve any forgiveness. My sin is just as wretched as the sin of the person who has offended me. That is a bold statement, but it is true. And when I got it, really got it, the key turned, and forgiveness was released into my heart.

I wish so badly that some of the people I love could understand this concept. I have seen the devastation it is causing in their lives, and many times in the lives of their children. I know that all I can do is pray for these people, and guard against the same thing in my own heart.

Matthew 9:2

"When Jesus saw their faith, He said to the paralytic, "Son, be of good cheer; your sins are forgiven you."

Nanny

Just a quick post. I have a lot to get done today. My grandmother died last night, and I'm trying to get things done before we go out of town for her funeral. She was old and very sick and we have been expecting her to go for several months now. My mom called me with the news.

I am so sad that she is gone. She was not always an easy woman to be around, but she was a powerful force and her presence will be missed. I know that she loved me very much, and I loved her too. Apparently when I was a toddler, when my parents made the announcement that they were leaving the country to go on the mission field, my grandmother tried to convince them that I should stay in America with her.

I don't know that much about her childhood, except that it was difficult. Her parents were divorced, in a time when divorce was still considered scandalous and disgraceful. Her father married a woman pretty close to her age and lived across the street from my grandmother and her mom. That must have been a tough way to grow up.

When I was in elementary school, and we were back in the states, Nanny lived on a lake. She taught us how to fish one summer. I'll never forget how she demonstrated the perfect way to cast a line. It apparently was perfect, because she pulled in a huge bass on her first cast. We were all delighted, and of course none of the rest of us caught a fish all afternoon!

Nanny loved to garden, and I'm sorry to say that I didn't get any of her green thumb. Even when she moved into an apartment, and left her beloved lake house, her small balcony was filled to overflowing with beautiful plants.

Nanny was a Christian, and I keep wondering what heaven must be like now that she is there. When I got the news that she had died, it had been less than an hour since she went. I tried to think about what she must be experiencing right that moment. But my human imagination failed me. I only know that it must be wonderful, and that she is glad to be released from her frail and suffering body here in this life.

I'm so thankful that I will see her again. And when I do we will both be in glory together.

Farewell Nanny. You taught me a lot about life. I love you. I will miss you. But I know I will see you again.


When peace, like a river attendeth my way,
when sorrows like sea billows roll;
whatever my lot, thou hast taught me to say,
It is well, it is well, with my soul.

O Lord, haste the day, when the faith shall be sight,
the clouds be rolled back as a scroll,
the trump shall resound and the Lord shall descend,
Even so, it is well with my soul.

More on Jonah

All that thinking about Jonah last week has borne some interesting fruit. I did a Google search and read through some sermons about Jonah. One sermon described in detail why Jonah was so unhappy about being sent to Nineveh.

Nineveh was an Assyrian city, and the Assyrians were famous for their extreme cruelty. I haven't done any firsthand research of the Assyrians, I am basing this on various sermons I have read, but apparently the Assyrians commonly tortured their enemies, and ruthlessly slaughtered them. Their tactics included skinning people alive and them impaling them on stakes, to be left to die. They also frequently forced their prisoners to witness their own children being burned to death before they were themselves killed. Sounds like a pretty rough group.

So you can begin to imagine why Jonah was more willing to run in the opposite direction than to go and convince the Ninevites to repent. I'd be pretty terrified too. Being skinned alive and impaled on a stake doesn't sound like an inviting prospect.

As I was driving around the other day I spent some time thinking about those Assyrians. Their reputed cruelty struck home with me. I have written before about how I have a hard time dealing with the reality of hell and eternal damnation. Believe me, I know all of the correct theology about this topic. I know that all men in their natural state deserve eternal damnation, and that God is gracious to forgive and accept any of us. All have sinned and fall short of the glory of God. There is none who is righteous, none. All men seek only evil continually in their hearts, from the time of birth.

But even knowing all of that, my human logic screams out that HELL IS NOT FAIR!!!!

My problem is that I don't really think that most people are all that bad. Yes, I know the truth. But I don't always really truly believe it. Or at least, I struggle with believing it. The time and generation that I have been born into is mostly made up of good seeming people. I don't have a whole lot of first hand experience with obviously evil people. Sure, I hear about them on the news, I read about them in the paper. But mostly, the people that I come into personal contact with seem pretty nice.

So sometimes I struggle with believing that all men are evil in their hearts. This is where all that thinking about Jonah and the Ninevites comes in to play. God has proved very faithful and patient with me in my struggle with doubt. He always seems to supply a gentle reminder when I need one. It was the Ninevites this time.

I just couldn't stop thinking about their cruelty. It literally made my stomach upset to think about what they did to their prisoners and enemies. The thought of me being skinned alive is pretty repulsive. But my psyche can handle that. What I can't handle is the thought of watching my children being burned to death. The evil and horror of someone deliberately doing that makes me want to vomit.

And as I was thinking about it and feeling sick, I felt like the Holy Spirit was reminding me...that is the evil that lurks in the hearts of men. And despite all of our civilization, refinement and gentility today, we could become the Assyrians tomorrow. Just ask the Germans. Or better yet, ask the Jews.

Romans 3:10-18

"As it is written:

"There is no one who is righteous, not even one;
there is no one who understands,
no one who seeks God.
All have turned away,
they have together become worthless;
there is no one who does good,
not even one."
"Their throats are open graves;
their tongues practice deceit."
"The poison of vipers is on their lips."
"Their mouths are full of cursing and bitterness."
"Their feet are swift to shed blood;
ruin and misery mark their ways,
and the way of peace they do not know."
"There is no fear of God before their eyes."

Father, forgive me for setting up my human understanding as the measure of truth. Thank you for all the times you forgive my accusations against You. Lead me in the way everlasting, and remind me that your ways are above my ways, that you are the only truth, the only righteousness, the only salvation, the only goodness that exists. Keep me in the circle of obedience, and give me the gift of faith. Amen.

A Good Example...

...of why it is dangerous to imagine that every whim entering our hearts is the leading of the Holy Spirit.

Just so you know, I really should be cleaning up my kitchen right now. But this sounds like more fun, so I'll load the dishwasher later.

Earlier this week, in the morning Bible Study, I had what I thought was the inspiration of the Spirit. But it proved to be my own imagination. Now, I think that we do get lead by the Spirit at times. And I have had experiences that I believe were divinely set in motion by the hand of God. Not visions or tongues or anything like that. But experiences that, in retrospect, were so unique or unlikely, that I had to chalk it up to divine intervention. But I do not believe that every whim or fancy that passes through my human mind is a direct communication from God.

Here is a great example of why, I think, that would be foolishness.

A woman was sharing the story of a friend's son who had spent a majority of his youth in serious rebellion. He was heavily involved in illegal drugs, and a generally unhappy lifestyle. Part of that lifestyle included having his arms and chest covered with tattoos. He has since completely turned his life around and become a Christian. But because of his tattoos, he must often wear a long sleeve shirt. For example, at his job, the tattoos must be completely covered.

While this woman was speaking, I had an inspired thought. I remembered a sermon I had heard about Jonah, and how his skin was covered with scars as a result of being exposed to the digestive juices inside the whale, or whatever it was, for three days.

We had just been discussing how God will use everything in our lives for His own glory ultimately.

So I thought, AHA! Those tattoos are a testament of the rebellion and sinful lifestyle that God delivered that young man from, just as Jonah's scars were a testament of the rebellion that God had delivered him from. I have to admit, I was pretty proud of my profound connection, and shared it with the entire group.

I even thought that it must have been an idea that was inspired by the Spirit, in just that moment, specifically so that I could share such a profound insight with my Bible Study group.

THEN, on the ride home, I decided that I had better look up the story of old Jonah, and verify that there was in fact some reference to him being covered with scars as a result of being inside the belly of the sea beast. It's a good thing I did. Turns out I imagined the whole thing. Well, maybe imagined is too strong a word.

I did in fact hear a sermon once, where the pastor suggested that it was likely that Jonah would bear some physical scarring as a result of what he had been through. But such an idea was mere speculation, and is in no way indicated by anything that can be found in scripture. I know because I looked. Extensively.

And then I sent out a group email to the entire Bible study group, explaining that I had been mistaken. Because, in the joy of what I thought was the "leading of the Spirit," I had actually claimed that scripture referred to Jonah's scars. It was an honest mistake, really it was. I certainly had no intention of misleading those women. But I did.

I think it is more likely that if the Holy Spirit were involved in that whole scenario in any way, it was by prompting me to go back and look at what the Bible ACTUALLY said. Not what I thought it said.

So that, all two of you who read this blog, is why I think it is best to be very cautious about what we attribute to the Spirit. Sometimes it is just our own human minds getting carried away.

Now, I think my dishwasher is calling my name. Or is that the Holy Spirit?????

Mercy to Job?

James 5:11 "Indeed we count them blessed who endure. You have heard of the perseverance of Job and seen the end intended by the Lord--that the Lord is very compassionate and merciful."

What's that? You call it mercy that he lost his CHILDREN, his possessions, his honor, his health? What kind of crazy mercy is that? I am not sure I like that kind of mercy. I am very sure that I don't want to experience it. But oh yes, mercy it is indeed, and in the end, compassion as well. I can relate. Well, only a tiny little bit. But still, it counts for me because it happened to me.

The day my first child was born, I almost bled to death. Now, I don't mean I lost a little bit of blood and they had to give me a transfusion, and then it took me a little while to get my strength back. No, I really did almost bleed to death. And I would have, it God had not mercifully orchestrated events to unfold exactly as they did.

My child, in utero, also could have bled to death the day she was born. In fact, she did have a blood transfusion.

In retrospect, it was the most merciful thing that God ever ordained for my life. Oh, don't get me wrong. It was a horrible experience. I hope I never go through anything that scary again. And I hope I never have to go through the months that followed again either.

But if I had not been through that day and all of the difficult months that followed, I wouldn't have the manifold blessings that I now have as a direct result of those trials. Yes, a direct result.

Here are some of the gifts that God had in store for me in the years after the birth of my first child:

1. humility
2. a servant's heart
3. compassion for hurting people
4. relevance to other traumatized mothers
5. deep faith
6. love for the Body of Christ
7. a heart of flesh
8. a yearning for heaven
9. hunger and thirst for righteousness
10. endurance for the race set before me

I could go on, but you get the idea. Those fruits did not happen overnight. Oh no, I had to spend months and even years in difficulty before they sprang forth. But it was all worth it. And I see the mercy of God in all of it. Yes, really, mercy.

If God had not gotten my attention, I would probably still be drifting through this life. I wouldn't be filled with purpose and joy and awe and love. God was merciful because He wanted more for me than I was providing for myself. He wanted me to get it, to get Him and how mind-boggling He really is. And unless He had forced me to see those things, I don't think I ever would have.

So yes, God's actions toward Job, and me too, were ultimately mercy.

Hebrews 12:5-7

"And you have forgotten that word of encouragement that addresses you as sons:

"My son, do not make light of the Lord's discipline, and do not lose heart when he rebukes you, because the Lord disciplines those he loves, and he punishes everyone he accepts as a son."

Endure hardship as discipline; God is treating you as sons. For what son is not disciplined by his father?"

The Red Sea and The Cross

Exodus 14:21-22

"Then Moses stretched out his hand over the sea; and the LORD caused the sea to go back by a strong east wind all that night, and made the sea into dry land, and the waters were divided. So the children of Israel went into the midst of the sea on the dry ground, and the waters were a wall to them on their right hand and on their left."

Isaiah 50:2

"Is My hand shortened at all that I cannot redeem?
Or have I no power to deliver?
Indeed with my rebuke I dry up the sea"


I had an AHA! moment when I read the verse in Isaiah. This might be an idea that everyone and their brother is already familiar with, but it was a new idea to me.

I think that the parting of the Red Sea serves to point us toward the work that Christ did when He died on the cross. The AHA came specifically because the verse in Isaiah is speaking of redemption along with the drying up of the sea. Let me see if I can explain.

Israel needed to get from point A to point B to escape from slavery and enter into the promised land (or, to be more exact, the path that would lead to the promised land.) But between point A and point B a great obstacle existed. This obstacle was impossible for them to overcome in their own efforts. They didn't have any boats. Not to mention, Pharaoh and a bunch of his henchman were hot on their tails, bent on leading them right back into slavery.

So God intervened and provided a path from point A to point B for Israel. He parted the waters of the Red Sea and the Israelites crossed through on dry land. Talk about an awesome sight! If God had not provided the way, not a single Israelite would have made it to the promised land.

Christ did the same thing for us when He died on the cross. Between us and God an impossible obstacle lay. Our sin. And not one of us could get from point A to point B without a path created by God Himself. All of our best efforts would be miserable failures.

Romans 3:10-12

"As it is written:

There is none righteous, no, not one;
There is none who understands;
There is none who seeks after God.
They have all turned aside;"

In order for us to be redeemed, God had to once again part the sea between Himself and His children. Christ's sacrifice on the cross was the way He chose to stretch out His mighty arm and redeem and deliver us.

I had never seen the connection before last week. I shared it with my evening Bible Study group. They had never made the connection either. I even ran the idea past my former pastor, just to make sure it passed the smell test. He thought it was a fair comparison. I'm certain beyond a shadow of a doubt that I an NOT the first person to make that connection. But I love that it was a discovery I made myself, through the study of God's word, and the inspiration of the Spirit.

I feel like I found the golden Easter Egg!

A Divine Appointment

I kept a divine appointment tonight. It was so obviously a divine appointment that my head is a little swimmy over the whole thing. I have only had this happen to me so obviously one other time. I'll have to post that experience some other time.

I'm going to tell you the whole story of how this divine appointment was set up, because all of the small details that put me in a specific place at a specific time so that the meeting could happen are pretty amazing. This post might end up being kind of long...

My husband came home and asked what was for supper. I had a huge pot of homemade chicken noodle soup in the refrigerator, but it didn't sound appealing to either of us so we decided to go out to eat. Our town has an event called First Friday in the downtown area. Many of the businesses have special offers and stay open late. Lots of people mill around on the streets. It is really fun. We decided to hit one of the new restaurants downtown and then walk around with little ones in a stroller for a while.

Well, I could see trouble as soon as we entered the restaurant where we intended to eat. It was packed and there were only two waitresses, who were running around like chickens with their heads chopped off. We had two small, hungry and unhappy children with us. I tried to convince my husband that we should just leave and go somewhere else. But he wanted to stay. So we did. For 20 minutes. Then we walked out. (I have never walked out of a restaurant before, by the way.)

So we walked to another restaurant, which didn't look nearly as busy. We ordered. Then I got a call on my cell phone. Our home alarm had been set off and the police were on the way to our house. I knew exactly what happened. I forgot to put our dog up, and he had run through the house and set off the alarm. But one of us had to leave the restaurant, go home and disarm the alarm or else our neighbors (and the dog) would be subjected to the ear-piercing sound of our alarm system. Our house is only about 5 minutes from the restaurant we were sitting in, so my husband left me there with the kids and went to take care of the alarm. Then he came back, and the food still had not come!

When he left and came back, he parked our car in a different parking lot. That later proved to be an important detail.

So we finally got our food (45 mins later!) and ate as fast as we could, because I was ready to get home and put the grumpy little ones to bed. But husband still wanted to walk around and see some people before we left downtown, so we did. We stopped and watched a man making a clay pot on a potter's wheel. The children were not nearly as impressed with that as we thought they should be. We stood and listened to a local band for several minutes. Then we decided to head back to the car.

As we were weaving our way through the crowded sidewalk, with a stroller, an old friend stopped us. So we stood and talked for several minutes. Then we continued on to the light at the corner to cross the street and walk the two blocks to where the car was now parked.

I have a habit of smiling at everyone I make eye contact with. I don't do it consciously, it is just part of my disposition. So while we were waiting for the light to change, I smiled at a middle aged woman who was also waiting on the corner. I am going to call her DV, for divine appointment.

DV: Do you happen to be walking back a few blocks to your car? I am feeling a little bit intimidated to walk that way by myself. I don't even know why I came down here tonight. It just seemed kind of strange, but I wanted to come down here.

Me: Yes, our car is in the same direction, you are welcome to walk with us.

DV: (glances toward the sky) Thank you God.

Me: It is amazing how God answers prayer so quickly sometimes, just like that, isn't it?

DV: Oh, yes, all the time.

We smile at each other again.

Me: (as we are crossing the street) You look vaguely familiar to me, but I can't place how I know you.

DV: Yes, you look familiar to me too.

I introduce myself. DV introduces herself. Her name rings a bell in my memory.

Me: Did you used to go to W church?

DV: Yes, I did. Until they told my husband to divorce me.

Me: Oh! (then silent)

At this point DV starts pouring out the story of how she had been in an unhappy marriage, but she loved her husband deeply. He left her, and apparently W church, or someone in leadership there, told him that he should divorce her. She did not want the divorce.

As we continued the walk to our car, she just kept talking about her ex-husband, the church and how the people in it had failed and disappointed her, and how she had learned to rely only on God, and less on people. I felt deeply saddened by her story. She talked about middle age, that she had been married for 25 years before her husband left her, that her husband had remarried two years ago. She was confused because she had always prayed for and desired reconciliation with him. But now he had a new wife and she didn't know what she was supposed to want anymore.


She did say that she had found another church, and was happy in it. She also said that she had recently met with the elders and the new pastor at W church. I don't know what conclusions she drew about the church as it is now, versus the church as it was when she left it several years ago. I told her that we were leaving that church too, but didn't really elaborate on why.

Then we got to our car. Hers was less than 20 feet away. What a coincidence, huh?

I took her hand and told her how glad I was to have met her. She really had just poured her heart out to me. We stood in the parking lot while my husband loaded the kids in the car and kept talking. She asked if she could give me a hug. Of course I gave her a big hug. She said she was sorry for telling me more than she probably should have, and how nice it was to meet me. I looked at her and said, "don't worry about it, don't you think that was exactly what was supposed to happen?" We got in our respective cars and drove off.

Then it struck me as we drove away. If the first restaurant had not been packed, if the second restaurant had not been so slow, if the house alarm had not been set off, if my husband had not driven home and then returned and parked in a different spot, if we had not decided to walk around downtown, if we had not watched the potter making a vase, if we had not listened to the band or stopped and talked to the old friend, we would not have ended up on that street corner at just that exact moment.

But it was a divine appointment, and there was no way we were going to miss it. How cool is that?

This is cool, too. I bet I will see DV again. We live in a smallish town.

*******************************************************

In the past two days, several people have filled me in a little bit more with the story of DV. She has apparently been reached out to and counseled by many people from W church, but has resisted all efforts at reconciliation. I certainly do not know the whole story, nor do I think it is any of my business unless DV wants to tell me about it herself. But one woman who is a member of W church, and who has also been something of a spiritual mother to me personally, told me that I should pray for her. You never know when God is going to step in and change someone's heart.

Crown Me Lord, Crown Me!

James 1:12

"Blessed is the man who endures temptation; for when he has been approved, he will receive the crown of life which the Lord has promised to those who love Him."

1 Corinthians 9:25

"And everyone who competes for the prize is temperate in all things. Now they do it to obtain a perishable crown, but we for an imperishable crown."

Revelation 3:11

"Behold, I am coming quickly! Hold fast what you have, that no one may take your crown."

2 Timothy 4:8

"Finally, there is laid up for me the crown of righteousness, which the Lord, the righteous Judge, will give to me on that Day, and not to me only but also to all who have loved His appearing."

Let me tell you, jewelry is something that I understand. I absolutely love beautiful jewelry. I always notice the jewelry that other women are wearing, and I love to wear it myself. I like the real, expensive kind; and the fun, inexpensive kind. I even have jewelry girlfriends. We always make a point of admiring each other's accessories when we see each other. It is all in good fun, no jealousy of any kind involved.

Less than a year ago, I had my wedding ring reset in a sparkling new setting. When I first picked it up, I was almost ashamed by how extravagant it was. But the jeweler promised me that I would get over that feeling quickly. He was right. I did. Here I am, it has not even been a whole year, and I am already planning ways that I can improve my wedding ring. Yes, the same one that I thought was too much jewelry less than a year ago. Talk about a naturally sinful heart. I don't need a better example than that!

Believe me, I don't consider this something to be proud of. Rather, I am pretty embarrassed to admit it. I do at least realize that no matter how much jewelry I have, it will never be enough to satisfy me, if that is what I am trying to get satisfaction out of.

I figured out a while ago that I was unable to be satisfied by anything but the riches of Christ. God was merciful to me in an odd way. He gave me everything I thought would bring me satisfaction relatively early in my life. And I was still desperately striving for something more. That is, until God decided to get my attention. Now, everything but Christ seems pale and shabby.

Oh, don't get me wrong. I still live in the flesh and am plenty influenced by it. But I have tasted and seen that the Lord is good. And I don't want nothin' else but Him.

Even though my earthly jewels will ultimately fail to satisfy, I look forward to the jewelry I have waiting for me in heaven. The kind that you wear on your head. The crown kind. I want to do whatever is necessary in this life to ensure that I will have crowns aplenty in the next. I am not kidding. The thought of spending eternity admiring the crowns on the saints around me, and not being delighted with my own, is appalling!

I'll pay the price, I'll endure the trial, I'll take the test, Lord. I see how fleeting it all is down here anyway. I want my jewels laid up in heaven. Lots of them. Really. Put me to work!

Hail to the Chief!

I took an online personality test. I was so shocked by the outcome, that I am going to post my results here.



Apparently I am a Chief personality, along with only about 1.5% of all women, and only about 4% of men. I suppose that makes me special! (Oh, I just love to be special!) Especially in the eyes of an unthinking and unfeeling personality profile program!

I have never thought of myself as a Chief. But I can see that I have very strong convictions. And I am comfortable leading a group. And I am quick to advocate my point of view (but only in a ladylike and genteel way, mind you!) So I suppose it might be right. I guess its just shocking to have someone show you a picture of yourself. Particularly when you didn't expect the given outcome.

By the way, a shout out to Classic Mama for pointing me in the direction of the personality test!

Old Like A Garment

Isaiah 51:6

"Lift up your eyes to the heavens,
And look on the earth beneath.
For the heavens will vanish away like smoke,
The earth will grow old like a garment
And those who dwell in it will die in like manner;
But My salvation will be forever,
And My righteousness will not be abolished."


Psalm 102:25-26

"Of old You laid the foundations of the earth,
And the heavens are the work of you hands.
They will perish, but You will endure;
Yes, they will grow old like a garment;
Like a cloak You will change them,
And they will be changed."

Hebrews 1:1-12 quotes Psalm 102:25-27

2 Peter 3:10

"But the day of the Lord will come as a thief in the night, in which the heavens will pass away with a great noise, and the elements will melt with fervent heat; both the earth and the works that are in it will be burned up."

This post is not going to be about the "End Times." There is no doubt that we are currently living in the end times. I can say that with certainty, not because I get carried away with trying to figure out the "signs" and "disasters" that happen. But because we know that Christ was sent to Earth in the "fullness of time." (See Galatians 4:4) Everything after His death IS the end times. But they might go on for another thousand years. I don't think we need to worry about it. That is God's business. What we do need to worry about is living each day we have in this life to the glory of our Father in Heaven. And living it in obedience to His commands.

Rather, this post is intended to counter all of the cultural hysteria we are constantly subjected to on the subject of global warming, from a Christian perspective. Now, I don't really have an opinion about whether global warming is scientific fact, or a big hoax. And if it is occurring, which I am willing to admit that it might be, I don't particularly get passionate about whether it is man made or a naturally occurring cycle of nature. I don't think it matters.

Sure, we should be good stewards of our natural resources. Being wasteful is foolishness. I think all of us should do our part to take care of this planet. But I KNOW that all of our best efforts to reduce, reuse and recycle are going to be pointless in the end. Let me reveal the surprise ending here......(drum roll please)....this earth is going to get old and worn out. And at some point, the time of which only the Father knows, it will be totally destroyed.

I'm sorry if you find that shocking, but it is plain old Biblical truth. Just read those scriptures at the top of the page. The end has been revealed. Earth will grow old like a garment. Picture that old worn out sweatshirt at the back of your closet. The neck is probably stretched out. It might have a few stains, a couple of loose seams. The fabric might be getting a bit thin in places. Then again, considering the affluence that most of us are surrounded by, we might not really have a good idea of what a worn out garment is like.

But God has already told us that our Earth is going to get old and worn out. In Isaiah 34:4 the heavens are described as "being rolled up like a scroll" in the end. We shouldn't be surprised by the deterioration of this planet. But more importantly, we should never live in fear of the future. I think that is what the basis of all this global warming hysteria really is. All of those doomsday predictions are designed to scare us half to death.

There is absolutely no reason that we should let ourselves get carried away by fear over global warming, or any other future disaster for that matter. All of it is completely under God's control. He planned all of it from the very beginning. He is not shocked or dismayed by any of it. All of it is part of His plan, and will ultimately bring about His glory.

How do I know? Because I read the Bible. Take a look at Psalm 46. I am going to quote a few excerpts, but you really should look it up and read the whole Psalm.

Psalm 46: 2-3,7,10

"Therefore we will not fear,
Even though the earth be removed,
And though the mountains be carried into the midst of the sea;
Though its waters roar and be troubled,
Though the mountains shake with its swelling."

"The LORD of hosts is with us;
The God of Jacob is our refuge."

"Be still and know that I am God;
I will be exalted among the nations,
I will be exalted in the earth!"

There you have it. Does the part about the mountains being carried into the midst of the sea sound familiar? Sounds an awful lot like some of those scary global warming predictions to me. I'm not saying that those predictions are going to happen, what I am saying is that even if they do, those of us who have been redeemed and called on by name shouldn't be scared about it.

Isaiah 43:1

"But now, thus says the LORD, who created you, O Jacob,
And He who formed you, O Israel:
Fear not, for I have redeemed you;
I have called you by name;
You are Mine."

Seek My Face

Psalm 27:4

"One thing I have desired of the LORD,
That will I seek:
That I may dwell in the house of the LORD
All the days of my life,
To behold the beauty of the LORD,
And to inquire in his temple."

Psalm 27:7-10

"Hear, O LORD, when I cry with my voice!
Have mercy also upon me, and answer me.
When you said, "Seek My face,"
My heart said to You, "Your face, LORD, I will seek."
Do not hide Your face from me;
Do not turn Your servant away in anger;
You have been my help;
Do not leave me nor forsake me,
O God of my salvation.
When my father and my mother forsake me,
Then the LORD will take care of me."

This Psalm means so much to me right now, as in this exact moment that I am typing this on my computer. My spirit is feeling so troubled, and has been for about 2 weeks now. There are plenty of reasons for it, I could just take my pick and make this post about any of them, really. But one thing has been weighing on my heart tonight, and I feel like this Psalms addresses it perfectly.

About a year ago, it was as if God did command me to seek His face. I don't mean that He appeared to me or communicated to me in some mysterious or supernatural way. He just grabbed my attention, completely and consumingly. He fueled a desire in my heart to seek Him with passion. And I did. Just like in the Psalm. My heart said, "Your face, LORD, I will seek." And the result of that seeking of God's face has been abundant blessing. I have written in other posts about how I feel like God has poured the Spirit out onto me. I was unprepared for how profound it would be. I feel like a different person, an alien, a strange duck, set apart, lifted above, all those things. And it is awesome. It is amazingly awesome. I don't ever want to lose it or go back to being just another pew sitting, powerless church-goer.

And I know that God will be faithful to me. I know He has not poured Himself out on me just to abandon me and leave me. But I feel like I am about to be tossed to some wolves. I really do feel like I am about to be uprooted and tossed out into the wastelands.

Here's why: we are changing churches. I don't want to. My husband does. And there is no way that we can go to different churches. And he is the one who gets to decide this issue. I'm not open to debate about that. He just is.

He doesn't really want to change churches either. But he has gotten to the point where he doesn't see any other way to deal with the situation. I'm not going to give you the details. That is not what this post is about.

But I have no confidence in the church we are going to start attending. We went there as newlyweds, and I was spiritually starved.

That is why the words in Psalm 27 are so powerful. "Do not hide Your face from me." "Do not leave me nor forsake me, O God of my salvation."


"Do not leave me nor forsake me,
O God of my salvation.
When my father and my mother forsake me,
Then the LORD will take care of me."

O LORD! Take care of me. I don't want to be forsaken.

The Itsy Bitsy Spider

This is not a post about anything spiritual. I just want to tell you that I am scared to death of spiders. I mean, running out of the bathroom naked and screaming, because there is a spider in the bathtub, kind of scared of spiders. This goes way back into my childhood. I lived in an area that was infested with massive spiders. There was no way to keep them out of your house. And they bit. Yes, really. They would bite me while I slept. My parents have pictures to prove it. They also had a nasty habit of hiding in unexpected places. I am not exaggerating.

So today, there is one of those tiny little jumping spiders hanging around my desk. He won't go away, no matter how many times I try to scare him off by thumping my pen near him. He has even jumped up on my arm a few times. If I were predisposed to see "signs from God," everywhere I looked, it would be very tempted to interpret this little spider as some kind of divine message. But I am not. I just think it's odd.

I don't find this kind of spider scary, by the way. Only the big ones, with long legs. The kind that are really quick and horribly ugly. It is making me nervous just to think about them. I stepped on one in my kitchen a few years ago. I couldn't even walk in the kitchen for two days.

Blind Faith

I happen to drive a very large vehicle. I also happen to have a very small garage in which to park my vehicle. I also have a fairly narrow driveway, which further complicates getting that big vehicle inside the small garage. But I do it every single day, most days more than one time.

When we first moved into this house, it was a real challenge. I didn't even think it was possible for me to get the big ole thing in the garage at all. But somebody showed me how to do it, and I believed it could be done. So I started practicing. At first it took several tries to make it into the garage. I would have to pull forward, brake, back up, stop, check my mirrors, pull forward and back up again until I finally got it right.

But over time it really did get easier. I started to notice certain points that I had to get just right, and if I did, then my car would slide almost effortlessly into the garage. Whenever I have friends in the car with me, they are amazed that I can park it so easily. Because it really does seem effortless now. But that is certainly not how it started out. I have white stripes on each side of my car to prove it. (My garage is painted white!)

Last night I got home late, after dark. It was pouring down rain. I could barely see out my windshield. But even in that downpour, I didn't even think about it. I had practiced so many times that I just parked that humongous car in that tiny garage with hardly a thought.

It got me thinking that faith is a lot like that. It seems so hard at first, maybe even impossible. We read the Bible, and through it God tells us to trust Him, believe Him, love Him, have faith in Him. But trusting and having faith can be huge challenges. It takes practice. It takes trusting Him in small things, seeing them through and then trusting Him again in the next instance. And after a while, you find that even in the downpour, even in the blinding, furious storm, you can trust Him. You can do it effortlessly. You hardly even have to think about it. It just comes naturally. Kinda like when I backed that monster sized vehicle through that narrow garage door last night.

Ephesians 3:16-17

"I pray that out of his glorious riches he may strengthen you with power through his Spirit in your inner being, so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith."

Repairer of the Breach

Isaiah 58: 9-12

"Then you shall call, and the LORD will answer;
You shall cry, and He will say, "Here I am."

If you take away the yoke from your midst,
The pointing of the finger, and speaking wickedness,
If you extend your soul to the hungry
And satisfy the afflicted soul,
Then your light shall dawn in the darkness,
And you darkness shall be as the noonday.
The LORD will guide you continually,
And satisfy your soul in drought,
And strengthen your bones;
You shall be like a watered garden,
And like a spring of water, whose waters do not fail.
Those from among you
Shall build the old waste places;
You shall raise up the foundations of many generations;
And you shall be called the Repairer of the Breach,
The Restorer of Streets to Dwell In."


I read this passage of scripture last week and it grabbed my attention. I have not been able to get it out of my mind. There are a lot of reasons for that. I don't think I could cover all of the riches in this passage in one post. Well, I could, but then I would have to neglect other things that need taking care of around here!

I have been experiencing a great churning of my heart lately. I don't know how else to describe it. About a year ago I experienced something that I have a hard time describing. The closest I can come, is to compare it to an explosion that happened inside of me. A spiritual explosion. I have been set on fire for God and His Word. I know that this is the pouring out of the Holy Spirit because I know that it is not from within myself. And that all things related to faith are a gift from God, and not of our own doing, or earning.

I have been at a loss as to why this powerful thing has happened to me. Part of the reason is because I don't sense this same thing happening in the people around me. I'm talking about people who are Christians, and love the LORD, and seek Him diligently. I don't see in them what I am experiencing in myself. And that makes me think that God is working this mighty work in my heart for a specific reason.

Maybe I have it all wrong. Maybe this is how all Christians are supposed to feel all the time. And maybe what I am experiencing is supposed to be the norm for Christians. But if it is supposed to be, I don't think it is. I see so many fellow believers struggling with unbelief, prayerlessness, doubt, dissatisfaction and just plain old lack of interest in things spiritual. I feel like I am the one who is out of the ordinary.

I'll tell you this much. I don't ever want to lose this. It is better than anything else I have ever experienced. I can understand why Christians are able to willingly become martyrs. I can say with conviction that God's lovingkindness is better than life.

So back to the purpose of this post, being the Repairer of the Breach. I suspect that God may be preparing me for some kind of ministry. I haven't been able to confess that to anyone yet. I don't want to get ahead of God. I also don't think that being called to ministry means being called to some kind of flashy, high-profile position. I think that right now I am being faithful by leading two Bible Study groups. I have also been actively pursuing relationships with other godly women. I have also started taking a writing course, which could certainly prove to be something that God uses me to minister through. I just don't know yet.

But I do know this. That nothing can change or shake the plan of the LORD. And I can rest assured that by obeying Him, I am pursuing His plan for my life. What it looks like now and what it looks like five years from now may be drastically different. But He will accomplish what He will accomplish. I don't have to worry about missing some mysterious "signs" or "clues" that God has laid out for me.

Ecclesiastes 3:14-15

"I know that whatever God does,
It shall be forever.
Nothing can be added to it,
And nothing taken from it.
God does it, that men should fear before Him.
That which is has already been,
And what is to be has already been;
And God requires an account of what is past."

So where does that leave me? Well, with a churning heart for one thing. And also with a realization that if God is going to use me, I have a lot of work to do. I feel like I am getting a late start. Why have I wasted so much of my life just flitting from thing to thing? I haven't even read the entire Bible!


But I would love to be called a Repairer of the Breach. What a title.

Bathsheba

I thought I might start explaining a little bit more about why Bathsheba's Children is such a meaningful phrase to me. I will probably expand on the idea even more in the future.

Here it is: I am Bathsheba. And I have had children in sin and I now have children that are "Jedidiah" (beloved of the LORD). No, no, not literally. But figuratively. I never had an extramarital affair with a powerful leader, I never got pregnant with an illegitimate child, and my husband was never killed in an underhanded plot by my lover. And then I never became the wife of one of history's most revered kings. Those things I do not share with Bathsheba.

But here are some things that we do have in common. I have been blessed to be raised knowing how to behave according to God's law. For part of my life, I took that knowledge and completely ignored it, and instead did what felt right to me at the time. I then spent a lot of effort trying to hide those actions from the rest of the world (that would be my friends and family.) You see, like Bathsheba, I had a need to appear one way to the world, even though my behavior was completely different from the image I presented.

Bathsheba certainly had a more compelling motivation for secrecy than I ever did. If my sins were made public, I would not have been drug out in public, stripped naked and then stoned to death. But I would have felt very ashamed. And I know that I would have disappointed people who loved me very much.

I also produced "children" while I was in sin. These children were things like: shame, confusion, fear, duplicity and stress. Not to mention the fruit of my sins: anger, disappointment with myself, guilt, fear of discovery and feelings of worthlessness. If you have read my post entitled Heart of Stone, you may be beginning to understand why my heart was so cold. I had a lot of emotional baggage that I was trying to deny existed. If I let emotion into my heart, I would have had to feel all of those negative feelings along with whatever else. That's why it was much easier to feel very little at all.

But if you will remember the story of Bathsheba, you will remember that her first son with David died as part of God's judgment on David's disobedience. I don't really want to elaborate on that point right now, because I am still mulling over some of the implications of that event. Suffice it to say that God has also removed the "children of my sin" from my life.

It is what happens to Bathsheba next that still leaves me with tears in my eyes every time I think about it.

2 Samuel 12: 24-25

"Then David comforted Bathsheba his wife, and went in to her and lay with her. So she bore a son, and he called his name Solomon. Now the LORD loved him, and He sent word by the hand of Nathan the prophet: So he called his name Jedidiah, because of the LORD."


Here's the thing. David had lots of other wives. Any one of them could have born David's successor to the throne. But they didn't. It was BATHSHEBA that God chose to bless as the mother of the next king over his people, Israel. And it was Solomon that became the greatest, wisest, most blessed king ever to rule over God's people.

GOD DIDN'T HAVE TO DO THAT!!!!!!

He didn't have to choose to bless Bathsheba that way. But He did. I just cannot get over how amazing that is. She was the least deserving of David's wives. The rest may not have been perfect, but there is not Biblical evidence to suggest that they were as scandalous as Bathsheba. But SHE was the one God chose to bless with Solomon.

God chooses to bless, and greatly use, scandalous sinners like Bathsheba. And he chooses to bless, and greatly use, scandalous sinners like me, and you, too. Do you get how awesome that is?

Why does He do that? Well, one reason is that all of us are scandalous sinners whether we like to admit it or not. Believe me, 5 years ago I would have been highly offended if anyone had suggested that I was Bathsheba (despite all of the evidence that I listed above, I spent a lot of time in serious denial!) And God delights to use the weak, the least, the longest shot. (Gideon, Moses, Esther, Joshua, Matthew and especially Paul are all great examples of this.) When God uses those who are weak, they provide the best reflection of His power and glory.

But I think the biggest reason is just that He loves us so much. Think John 3:16. His love for us is so powerful and effective, that He doesn't just choose to forgive us when we sin. He turns it around and says "Guess what, my little child, watch me show off in the ways I am going to bless you. You haven't even comprehended the amazing blessings that I am waiting to pour out onto you."

Oh yes, He is that good. And oh yes, we are that undeserving.

I am going to save my "Solomon" descriptions for another post. I think that is enough for now. Here's a closing thought:

Philippians 3: 12-14

"Not that I have already attained, or am already perfected; but I press on, that I may lay hold of that for which Christ Jesus has also laid hold of me. Brethren, I do not count myself to have apprehended; but one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind and reaching forward to those things which are ahead, I press toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus."

So be it Lord.

Light in a Dark Place

Esther 2:7

"Mordecai had a cousin named Hadassah, whom he had brought up because she had neither father nor mother. This girl, who was also known as Esther,"

The name Esther, and Hadassah, are translated as "star." I have always preferred the translation, "Light in a Dark Place."

What a great name meaning! It never occurred to me until very recently that my name, Hadassah, could actually be a literal translation of what God had in store for my life. Now, please don't get me wrong. One thing that is neat about stars is that the sky is full of them. They do not shine into darkness by themselves. And I don't think that God has any intention of making me shine by myself. I have been so encouraged lately to find so many women who share the passion that I have for God.

But I do want to be a light in a dark world. Even in the sky that I am placed in right now, surrounded by other lights, I see an awful lot of darkness. It doesn't take much looking around to see it. Off the top of my head right this instant I can think of women I know who are struggling with homosexuality, adultery, eating disorders, substance abuse, depression, abandonment, anger, jealousy, and divorce. And I'm only thinking of the women in my circle who do not know Christ. The Christians I know are struggling with some pretty scary things themselves.

There is a big difference in the two groups though. One group has real hope and the ability to overcome those struggles. The other, well, I hope that they can get help. But really, unless they let God fill up the voids in their lives that those problems are either a result of or the motivation for, chances are that they will end up replacing one problem with another.

That is why it is so important for us to be light in a dark place. There is darkness all around us. If you can't see darkness around you, I would suggest that you either aren't really looking, or that your world is much too small. Light is useless if it does not shine into the darkness.

Matthew 5:14-16

"You are the light of the world. A city that is set on a hill cannot be hidden. Nor do they light a lamp and put it under a basket, but on a lampstand, and it gives light to all who are in the house. Let your light so shine before men, that they see your good works and glorify your Father in heaven."

John 1:4-5

"In Him was life, and the life was the light of men. And the light shines in the darkness, and the darkness did not comprehend it."

John 3:19-21

"And this is the condemnation, that the light has come into the world, and men loved darkness rather than light, because their deeds were evil. For everyone practicing evil hates the light and does not come to the light, lest his deeds should be exposed. But he who does the truth comes to the light, that his deeds may be clearly seen, that they have been done in God."

John 12:36

"While you have light, believe in the light, that you may become sons of light."

Ephesians 5:8-11

"For you were once in darkness, but now you are light in the Lord. Walk as children of light (for the fruit of the Spirit is in all goodness, righteousness, and truth), finding out what is acceptable to the Lord. And have no fellowship with the unfruitful works of darkness, but rather expose them."


Psalm 119:105

"Your word is a lamp to my feet and a light to my path."


Ever since God began to shine His light into the deepest parts of my heart, I don't think it is even possible for me to hide my light from the world. Part of the reason I have been writing this blog is because if I did not have a chance to get this out there, I would be unbearable to be around. I really don't want to talk about anything else besides God and what He is doing in me and for me.

But I realize that most people do not appreciate having God shoved down their throats. I think it is much wiser to be pleasant to be around, and able to engage people on a variety of subjects. The light of the Lord always shines through in every situation. But it is often not because I am talking about it specifically.

For instance, when I was visiting a large city this summer, my husband and I met up with some of his old friends. They are not Christians. After spending several enjoyable hours together, one of them said to me. "I admire your faith, I can tell that you have something real going on inside of you, I think its really neat." Now, we had not talked about anything even remotely religious. Just chit chat. But the light shone through me. I just can't hide it.

Light in A Dark Place. I want my light to keep growing brighter. There is so much darkness around me that needs the light.

Heart of Stone

I have been so anxious to get to my computer all day and get this post up. But it has been one thing after another all morning. So here I am, taking a deep breath, and here we go...

Ezekiel 36:26-27

"I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit within you; I will take the heart of stone out of your flesh and give you a heart of flesh. I will put My Spirit within you and cause you to walk in My statutes, and you will keep My judgments and do them."

Jeremiah 24:7

"Then I will give them a heart to know Me, that I am the LORD, and they shall be my people and I will be their God, for they shall return to me with their whole heart."

If you have been reading this blog, you may have perceived that I can be pretty emotional. Well, that has not always been the case. I feel like I really did have a heart of stone for most of my life. It has only been in the past 4 years that I have learned how to really feel things deeply. I like to say that God has been working on giving me a heart of compassion. But really, compassion is just a part of the whole spectrum of emotions God has placed into my heart.

The process of removing my stone heart and replacing it with one of flesh has been pretty painful for me. But I can see very clearly that if I had not been made to go through some painful experiences I would not have accepted the heart that God had in store for me.

My heart of stone was bound up in such a way that I felt very little emotion at all. That was a very safe way to live my life. I didn't let myself get hurt by very much, and I certainly did not plug into the pain of those around me. But because God loved me enough to pour his grace and overwhelming love into my heart, I am a changed person. I feel thing very deeply. In fact, I like to joke that maybe God has given me a little too much compassion. I find tears welling up in my eyes amazingly often when I am having conversations with other women. Sometimes it really hurts to feel so strongly. I suffer when those I love suffer. I even suffer when I hear about people I barely know suffering.

BUT, the most awesome side effect of all this emotion is the way that scripture has become ALIVE when I read it. I no longer can read the account of Hagar and Ishmael without weeping. Abraham's emotional turmoil as he is preparing to sacrifice Isaac is almost more than I can bear. And today, when I read the account in Matthew about Jesus being betrayed by Judas and then being abandoned by his disciples, I could barely see through my tears to read the words on the page. Jesus loves me that much! And I accuse God of not caring! Woe to my foolish human nature. How I wish I could see things as God does.

And then, I will read something in Psalms, and I will want to explode with joy. The love that I now understand makes me want to jump up and touch the clouds above! Sometimes I'm pretty sure that I could reach them, too! That is how real my joy is.

I was thinking about a hymn that I love last night on the way home from the evening Bible study.

"O for a thousand tongues to sing my great Redeemer's praise!
The glories of my God and King, the triumphs of His grace."

That caught my sentiment exactly. My one little tongue is inadequate to sing the praises of God that flow through my heart. I would need at least a thousand of them to do it justice.

Back to the suffering for a moment. Even that drives me to God for relief. When I see or experience suffering it makes me long for eternity. I know I have expressed that in several posts. I don't know how else to deal with the horrible circumstances that I hear about sometimes. The truth is that man is not created to handle such pain. We were created to glorify God and enjoy eternal fellowship with Him. And because this world is under the curse of sin, it won't happen to us in this earthly existence. But thank the LORD that He loved us enough to create another way to it.

Aside from the personal nature of my new heart, I think that I have begun to see more of what God's heart for us must be like. He looks on our suffering with compassion. He loves us with love so strong that He died on the cross for us. A cold, stony heart cannot begin to comprehend those powerful emotions. But a new heart, one made of flesh, can begin to.

Entreat Me Not to Leave You

This is one of the most beautiful expressions in the Old Testament, in my opinion. You will often hear it read at weddings, and although the original context has nothing to do with a husband and wife, the statement is so lovely, I can understand why it is done.

Ruth 1:15-18

"And she said, "Look, your sister-in-law has gone back to her people and to her gods, return after your sister-in-law." But Ruth said:

"Entreat me not to leave you,
Or to turn back from following after you;
For wherever you go, I will go;
And wherever you lodge, I will lodge;
Your people shall be my people,
And your God, my God.
Where you die, I will die,
And there will I be buried.
The LORD do so to me, and more also,
If anything but death parts you and me."

When she saw that she was determined to go with her, she stopped speaking to her."

First of all, WHEW!, I could read that and just cry over the beauty of it. What a precious promise to make to another woman, the woman who is in essence, your own mother.

But stepping back from the beauty of it for a moment, I started wondering about the practical reasons why Ruth might feel so strongly about staying with her mother-in-law. Certainly it is possible that Ruth had deep and profound love for Naomi. In fact, I think it is pretty clear that she did feel that way. But perhaps there was more to the story that is not recorded in the Biblical account.

Maybe Ruth came from a family that she did not want to go back to. Maybe they were cruel people. Maybe Ruth and her mother did not get along. Maybe Ruth's father was an overbearing and demeaning man. Perhaps they were very poor and she did not want to become a burdensome mouth for her mother to feed. It could be any number of reasons.

Think for a moment about what a dramatic decision Ruth was making. She was leaving her country of origin, her home where she belonged and had roots. She was leaving all of the comforts of familiarity to travel to a foreign land, where she would not only be a stranger, she would be unprovided for and vulnerable. Women really needed the protection of a husband or a father in that time. And she was not traveling to Bethlehem with any of that assurance. She was risking so much to follow Naomi to a place of uncertainty.

I'm not trying to take anything away from Ruth by suggesting that she had more motive than just love for Naomi. Like I said, that could stand alone as the sole motivation for the decision she made. But there is a part of me that suspects there was more going on in Ruth's life. And I think it is an important thing to consider.

Clearly, God had a perfect and beautiful purpose for bringing Ruth to Bethlehem and ultimately to Boaz. He has a perfect and beautiful purpose for each of His children. But God uses circumstances that we just see as ordinary every day life, or mundane insignificant details, or the way things just "happened" to work out, to bring about His plans for us. It is so tempting to look back at the lives of the people who's stories are recorded in the Old Testament and forget that they were real people just like us. They had all kinds of motivations and circumstances in their lives that God used to bring about His plan, and ultimately, His glory. Things were not happening in their lives by chance or accident. But they probably didn't see it that way as they were living through the day to day details of it.

Maybe Ruth's mother was dead, and her father had remarried a woman who held Ruth in contempt and was jealous of her beauty. That might not seem like a circumstance divinely laid out by God, but it certainly would accomplish His plan. That plan being to get Ruth to Bethlehem, hence to Boaz, and more importantly, into the lineage of Jesus Christ, God's Son.

The point I hope I am making is this:

Everything in our lives is part of God's plan for us. He is totally sovereign over ever single detail. Even the things that make no sense to us, or seem too insignificant to be of any consequence are part of God's plan for our lives.

I can look back at my own life and see decisions that I made, which seemed very small at the time, but resulted in huge changes later on. For instance, I can trace back the way I met my husband to being at a party, and being offended by something a particular woman said, and deciding that I didn't want to be part of her circle of friends. That small thing led to another thing, which led to other things, which ultimately led me to meeting the man that God intended for me to marry. When that first woman left a bad taste in my mouth, the last thing on my mind was that her obnoxious behavior was going to lead me to holy matrimony.

That is why when I look at the story of Ruth, I wonder what else was happening in her life that motivated her to make the decision she did. I don't think it takes anything away from her to consider her story in that light. After all, I believe that she was a very real person, who lived in a real life, and experienced that life just like any other person would. Things were happening to her that she couldn't see the end result of. I'm sure that the exact same thing is happening to me, and to you, right now, today. Don't miss God's hand in your life because it seems mundane. Sometimes His plan is in the mundane, because that is how we experience life. And God has intentionally set out to make Himself known in ways that we can experience! The instances of God appearing personally to someone, or even sending one of His angels to announce His plan are pretty rare when compared to the unknown multitudes of people whose lives He has laid out in intimate detail.

So don't be discouraged! Even when we can't see the end result God can. And believe me, nothing that we can do is going to mess up God's plan. It just doesn't work that way. He is totally in charge all of the time. I don't know about you, but I find that very comforting.